Nursery

Me ! I’m waiting till the year before school

I literally just have no need, but I’m worried I’m holding her back? I work evenings, my partner works the day and is always home on time for the cross over. She’s doing so well developmentally, we go to places together for her to socialise with children her age. Everyone says it’s good for them but like I just can’t see what a nursery provides for her that I can’t and I’m really fortunate to have the working pattern that I can keep her with me. I just feel like it would be so horrible to not have her home for the short years before school starts, whilst I’m home anyway? She also has a little sister 19 months younger so she’s never without a social buddy?

I'm not. As good as a nursery can be, they themselves will tell you, due to the number of children to 1 care worker, they can't have eyes on your child at all times. I don't trust anyone with my babies. My son has an older and younger sister and I attend soft play for peer play.

If you can keep her with you, I would. There is no better care than a mom gives to their child. I dont think their emotional needs are being met at nursery. Which is soo important at such young age. They have all their life to socialise. I chose a childminder to help here and there when we needed but I didnt agree with nurseries either. I worked in some so I know how many babies were left crying due to short staff.

I recently watched something about the importance of a child staying home with parents instead of going to nursery. It talked about how the first 3years are critical and the mental health effects later down the line as well as poorer relationships with their parents. Even kids that stayed with grandparents or people they were familiar with were affected just not as much as the children being left with complete strangers in an unknown environment. The system is pressurising women to return to work, there is not enough support or encouragement. They benefit too much from both parents paying taxes and money rules the world unfortunately. No one truly cares about our wellbeing, it’s all down to us. We didnt send our kids to nursery and will not be, both my kids are thriving and developing perfectly fine without nursery. Everything they do at nursery can be done at home and there are so many different types of clubs and other places we can take them to socialise but also be present.

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3115616/

https://ifstudies.org/blog/another-perspective-on-the-latest-research-on-early-child-care

My daughter won’t be starting school until she’s 5 and I’ll be keeping her home with me until she’s 3.5/4, then I’ll do a couple mornings pre school to get her ready for reception when she’s 5, as I don’t want it to be a huge shock for her. I love being a sahm and we have so much fun together. We are out everyday doing different activities and do lots of learning, playing and cuddling when we’re home too. I’m also looking into flexi schooling where she is home 1 day a week too as I personally feel 35 hours a week at school over 5 days is too much. I want her to have a great education and enjoy making and playing with friends at school, but I also think time bonding and learning and being with me is equally, if not more important at such a young age x

It’s not just about social skills They learn so much at nursery it’s not just playtime for years and years

I think whatever you feel is best for you and your child is the right decision. I only started my daughter in nursery now (she’s almost 2), but I was lucky and had family help, so I didn’t need to use childcare before then. I can see she is definitely ready for nursery now and although she was going to groups and socialising, it’s not quite the same as being in a nursery environment. The post above which says sending your child to nursery is detrimental for their mental health and results in poor relationships with parents is just not accurate. The study linked is 13 years old and looks at children from disadvantaged backgrounds, so it’s likely the outcomes they found are to do with other factors (the authors even said this themselves). It also specifically looked at children whose mothers were not present for long periods of time, such as a week at a time. Lots of studies have shown that high quality childcare is positive for children’s social, cognitive and language skills.

We are sending to preschool/headstart next year to get her used to everything and ready to start Pre-K the following year. I want her to be able to tell me what's going on there before I send her anywhere.

My daughter goes to nursery and has done since 11 months, but had I the choice, I would have kept her home with me. I don’t regret sending her but they’re only little once. I’m going on mat leave from Jan and will likely take her out nursery for the year while I’m off work. She has learnt a lot from nursery, but I have friends that don’t send their LOs to nursery and they’re very smart too. I do think it can depend how you spend your time with them in the day. They are only little once so do what’s best for you. 😊

I’m sending my 2 year old but because he’s behind with speech I’m anxious about it so will see how the first two days go I’m thinking of taking him out even before he’s started Sounds terrible I know but my anxiety can’t handle it