How to teach toddler to self-settle and fall asleep on their own?
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I BF my little girl and still do (she’s 19 months). At 12 months I trained to self settle by feeding with the lights on in another room and then putting her in her cot straight after her feed. I’d stay in her room right next to her and pat and shush. She would whinge a little and if she ever cried, I’d always pick her up and cuddle her (I’m not about CIO methods). Some nights it would take 45 mins to an hour. But over the course of 2 weeks, she settled and knew the drill. She knew if she cried I’d always come and she learnt to self settle that way. Try not to associate BF with sleeping. I know it sounds crazy, but the patting and shushing really helped her to learn self settling. Hope that helps x
I don’t really know if this is advice, more just what I do with my little boy - at this age they really are understanding of our words etc, so perhaps after the bedtime routine, when popping them in their cot/bed to sleep, tell them that it’s bedtime/sleep time now, that you love them, and you’ll see them in the morning. My son doesn’t get put in his cot asleep - he’s awake but calm after some milk and a cuddle and a book. He takes at least 30mins to get to sleep, he’s rolling about, nuzzling his pillow and sometimes talking to his teddies 😂 We also use the explanation process (as I’ve named it!) if he wakes in the night and after 10/15mins hasn’t managed to get himself back to sleep - we will pop in, stroke his back a little, wait til he’s calm, and explain again that it’s sleep time, we love him, and that we are going to bed now (AKA leaving the room) It’s a process for sure but I can say for us it works 90% of the time (obviously not including times he’s poorly) x
@Caley Thanks for sharing. I’ve been trying something similar. Bedtime story cuddled on the chair, popping into cot explaining sleepy time, see you in the morning etc etc. but then as soon as turn light off my little girl starts crying and says “cuddle” so end up having to pick her up and then she falls asleep being held. Did you experience this when you first started? She’s generally okay in the night and can self settle then when she wakes, just not going to sleep.
Yes we certainly experienced alot of push back! We started this method back when he was around 10 months old. Essentially it was a type of sleep training I suppose. We would pop in every 10mins if he hadn’t settled to remind him we were and are always there. Eventually, after a really rough week or so, it just clicked. It isn’t for everyone. It’s not quite as intense as the CIO method but you do have to endure a lot of tears x
I'll be interested to hear real advice on this. I'm still breastfeeding mine to sleep and just too tired to try sleep training that I read about. Real life advice would be good!