When I tell my boyfriend I’m struggling to cope he tells to grow up and get a grip

I’m sleep deprived mum of a lovely little girl (9 months old) but lately I’ve been feeling really frustrated and upset. I feel so lonely snd like I never get any help. Nt mums a narcissist so promised to help but once baby was here and novelty wore off she didn’t anymore. Then my boyfriend only helps if I have to ask him to which he guilt trips me and says “thank god your daughter has me , not so much you” and even then he is like “where’s her dummy, where’s her nappy’s, where’s her etc” He also messes up my house and leaves shit stains on towels , clothes all over the floor and when I mention it he says “don’t start!” Then I eventually snap at him and I’m the bad person. He never wants to be around me unless there’s something in it for him but he will not leave. I’ve told him I may aswell be on my own but he won’t leave, he said his paid for my furniture (sofa & bed) so it’s his right to stay here. I hate that my daughter has to witness this and I love her to bits although sometimes I do want to run far away and I hate myself for thinking like that