Please.. AITA

Many, many people are shocked at how well I usually keep the house with 2.5 kids - 9, 4 and 1. I have a part time SE job myself. I do EVERYTHING CARE WISE with the kids. He does absolutely nothing but play fight with them here and there, offer treats and days out etc. occasionally plays instruments with them. Gets upset if I ask him to have his own kids so I can go out. We do this type of dance at least once a month. I feel gaslit and shat on every time but always end up being the one “apologising” and promising to be better. First pic is after I asked him if he had time to come to our 4 yo first parents evening tomorrow. Rest of the pics in comments I hope in chronological order..

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I would take your kids and run as fast as you can!! Expecially if it keeps happening you both work so you both should help each other out in the house, sounds like a man that wants his cake and eat it to, needs to grow up by the the sounds of it, we don’t live in the 50s anymore, has anyone told him that we are in 2024, controlling behaviour and that ain’t good for either your or your kids because they will grow up thinking that’s ok to treat people, I would run as fast as you can and never look back, it’s only going to get worse

This sounds very much like my ex I was with him for 10 years and was an out and out narcissist I literally could send you screen shots of him of him saying that I'm not washing clothes properly ect ect it was always finding an excuse to knock me down a few pegs because I was happy or had a good day. He didn't want to be happy he wanted to control absolutely everything about me

Wow. Just look at the way he’s speaking to you, it’s so confrontational and aggressive, demeaning. Why is he telling you off like you’re a child? Like he’s better than you? And this happens regularly?! A relationship, a partnership is just that- you’re partners, equals, and sometimes that doesn’t look like 50/50 but you’re a team and you help eachother and sometimes that means picking up the slack when the other person has a lot on, sometimes it means doing the opposite and relying on them to do more than their fair share. But it also doesn’t mean making the other person feel like shit about it, feel like they’re useless, that they owe you etc etc. This doesn’t sound healthy at all, if this is how communication can look between you. Couples counselling? If you wanted to, of course. If not, I would leave.

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