Husband is mad at me we won’t talk to me
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I got HG in both my pregnancies. When I got it with this pregnancy, the only medication that helped made me sleep all day. When I was awake I was throwing up. Obviously I was unable to clean the house. My husband never yelled at me for it or implied I don’t do anything. He took over all the cleaning and took care of my son. I will admit he was getting paid to go to college (online) so he was home all the time, but your husband working is no excuse for him to treat you like that. He helped get you pregnant. I agree you guys need to have a conversation, preferably on a day where he doesn’t work because it sounds like he’s taking out work stress on you. But I want you to know you don’t deserve to be treated like this and it’s not asking for a lot for him to cut you some slack. Obviously you did a great job before you got sick and I’m sure you’ll pick up right where you left off when you’re feeling better.
I completely understand and can 100% relate to this situation pm and we can talk / vent more about it !
Sounds like my husband don’t put him on bc, you’re probably gna wind up taking the baby and run cause he’s starting to show his real colors
U can pm me if u want I’d be glad to talk to u privately bit due to my own issues and not know who’s on here seeing what in his family I gta protect myself
Did you know that giving the silent treatment (which he did to you) is abuse. Honestly you did absolutely nothing wrong and have nothing to apologize for! Your job is your health and your kid! That is the priority! It’s absolutely heartless how he treats you! Like I said he is abusive emotionally by giving you the silent treatment. Honestly he won’t get better and you would do better off without him because you work longer hours than him! Stay at home moms job is 24-7 round the clock care! He gets to clock out! And if he wants dinner then he can cook it or buy it. He is a fucking adult! He expects you to be a fucking slave! Do not apologize because that gives him power over you. This is supposed to be a partnership and he’s expecting you to be a 1950s housewife and no that shit don’t fly no more! He sounds like a narcissist and you will always have to walk on egg shells around him! The abuse will get worse and not better. You need to plan an escape!
Life is too short to waste on misogynistic abusive men. Period. The more we coddle them and stay with them the more we allow the behavior to continue!
Furthermore- this is the kind of behavior these men are showing your kids! Your kids are going to grow up thinking it’s normal to be emotional abused! Or they grow up and learn to be emotionally abusive like their dad in this case. That is what got me to leave my kids dad. I absolutely did not want my kids to think I would settle in abusive relationship! I had to break the cycle! I grew up watching my mom be toxic in all kinds of relationships and it fucked up my views on relationships so I got into abusive relationships. But i refused to stay cuz my kids deserve to see me happy and not abused! And my kids also flourished once his abusive ass was out of the house! It’s really important to note kids are best when their moms are happy and not dealing with abuse!
He should not yell at you, and accusing you of vomiting to make him feel bad is utterly ridiculous. In a calmer moment, he needs to acknowledge that was out of line (very self-centered) and apologize. He needs to believe you want the best for your family and are doing the best you can. When you go through hard times, he needs to give you the benefit of the doubt. Ask him for that and see what he says. If he says it's not enough, he can help figure out another way because that's what you have/can do right now. The problem is clearly not that you don't want to do the work (you've been doing it) it's that you are at your physical, mental, and emotional max. Remind him you are a team solving life's problems together. If he can't get there, you will ultimately need to leave and make space for someone who can.
Silent treatment is low level abuse, shouting especially if he does it continually is abusive and contemptuous insults are abusive.
Update: I’ve been sick this morning and had a little blood and I called to tell him he straight ignored my call and texted him and he hasn’t even called to make sure I’m ok
Incognito- he is showing you who he is! You deserve to be with someone who cares about your well being- physically, emotionally, spiritually… and clearly he rather see you in pain than give a damn. Time to leave cuz it won’t get better! You have to accept people for who they are and not the potential you see in them!
I can kinda see his frustration though, especially if the poor bloke is working 60hrs a week, that's alot! I can understand not wanting to cook when you feel sick (I felt the same) but maybe do at least one thing a day, like laundry, hoovering etc?
@Rebecca being a stay at home mom is far more demanding than 60 hours a week at work…OP is doing everything she can and she’s sick!! We are supposed to be supporting each other- siding with an abusive man is kinda really disgusting!
Y’all feeling bad for this man like he wouldn’t have to do MORE if she wasn’t around 🤣 boo hoo, the poor grown man has to make himself food and wash some dishes. She still did laundry. Her son is still alive. If he wants a clean house and dinner on the table, he can hire a temporary homemaker until his WIFE feels better
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I completely relate. I went through the same thing kn early pregnancy my 2nd and 3rd time. I told my husband I needed the help because I felt so sick I couldn’t even move around or deal the smells of cleaning supplies without gagging and choking while peeing my pants 😵💫. I hired help, it was $110 every 2.5 weeks and beyond worth it. I also had some friends that would come help me and I returned the favor when they were pregnant or going through something and needed the help. It’s important for him to understand what’s going on and not that you just randomly changed into some lazy partner, it’s unfair for him to treat you as if you are choosing this.
It sounds like there is a huge communication issue here , I completely understand his frustration , especially if he knows your capabilities and is used to a clean house that’s well looked after , but he needs to understand how your feeling at the moment and that your capabilities have changed , and you both need to sit down in a. Calm environment, both talking and no one shouting and come to a compromise while your so unwell. Maybe a one off cleaner come in for a day to get on top of everything for you so you have a restart to keep on top of rather then trying to catch up while doing the day to day etc xx