Inlaws inviting themselves
My inlaws live 5 hours away. They have gone from not caring when they see us and that being only maybe 5 times a year to since our daughter was born, wanting to see us all the time and being so overwhelming to our daughter. They went away and they hadn't seen us for maybe 4 weeks and they apparently were harassing my husband saying they were really upset they hadn't seen our daughter and wanted to come see her while i was at work. I've had a multitude of issues with them, particularly FIL with boundaries and I told my husband that they can wait until the very next week when we were in their town. Fast forward to when we were in their town. So all our family is from our town. Admittedly, they do have a small beach house/shack and that's where we are staying. We have been able to stay there many times before but they've invited themselves up to stay with us and my SIL and her family have too. 3 bedroom shack with 1 bathroom and toilet with 10 people. I asked my husband to tell them that they're welcome to visit but we are staying at this shack and not with family because we want our space. MIL said to me today (they've all come today) "I know we're gatecrashing your little holiday and it's a lot but that's just the kind of family we are". My husband when I told him saw nothing wrong with this. I don't know what to do. These guys are so stressful to my daughter and I. She won't go to them still and they're so pushy. I told my husband I'm not doing this again and he got angry and said that I can't always get what I want. Help
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You need to make it clear to your husband about your needs and boundaries. Setting boundaries is always hard but they help you in long run. It is best to have an open hearted conversation with your husband about how you feel. Being a parent, your job is to protect and safeguard your child and not to expose them to situations that are overwhelming or too much for them. Tell your husband you’re just being a protective momma bear. Hope he understands.
You should have responded “funny, you weren’t “this type of family” before my daughter was born” 🙄
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There is no reason for them to stay with you. Especially to the detriment to your daughter. How does your husband not see that if they push and push with your daughter, it isn’t going to benefit their relationship with her but ruin it. I am fortunate that my in laws aren’t pushy and always ask and never impose (I think they know if they tried it they’d have very limited access to their little angel). Maybe point out to your husband that this is for the sake of your daughter and not your feelings as such. That may sway his view on things?