Nursery dispute

Ha totally get where you’re coming from!! It’s the nesting urge and makes it all feel so real!! That being said, the baby is technically suppose to sleep in your room for the first 6 months. So will hardly be in there. My kid didn’t make into his nursery until he was 2. And by then we were in floor bed/bed room territory. 😂 completely skipped a nursery

I completely get where you’re coming from. My nesting urge was crazy and I was on at my husband to get it completed so soon. We had it done by the 2nd trimester. Like Van said baby will be in with you for the first 6 months, so it’s not the end of the world to wait, but I definitely understand this is putting a damper on your excitement. Maybe explain to your husband how important you find it and it will help you both develop your bond with baby before they arrive xx

Baby won't be in there for a long time so there is really no rush, but I get you in terms of the nesting instinct. My 17 month old is still in my room - in my bed in fact 😂 so his room is mostly used for laundry!

I understand both sides. However the reality of it is you won't use the nursery for the first 6 months and even then, you may have a baby who settles better with you. Have a proper discussion with your partner and see if you can come to a compromise x

I think you both have good points, maybe you could meet in the middle and decorate & put baby’s things in there, but leave the cot out for now and keep a bed in there? Chances are baby won’t use it as a nursery for the first 6 months anyway, and it might be nice to have a bed so each of you could sleep away from baby now and then if you’re getting exhausted, whilst the other does the night shift.

I got the urge but we did keep the spare bedroom and I’m glad we did. There are other ways you can best and prepare. I got our bedroom ready for the baby and set up a little baby area in our living room and that got me very excited

Can you compromise- decorate the room for a nursery, get your changing table in there etc but leave a bed and the cot until after the birth? We used a next 2 me for the first 6 months, the cot wasn’t needed until after then. Just a thought? Pros of decorating first is that you won’t have time and energy to decorate later x

We decorated the room ready for our little one who is now 3 months, the only reasons I go in there is to get her clothes each morning and evening! She won’t be sleeping in there until 6 months and we’re yet to paint her cot the colour we want it, no rush as she isn’t in there yet. Having said that we do have another spare room but I think the urges for nesting are there but at the same time the help in the beginning can be very much appreciated, so possibly try and find a compromise? x

I’m so excited for our nursery to be ready, hopefully it will be ready the month before the baby is here. A big bonus of having the nursery already set up is so I can put all the baby things in there rather than in our main bedroom. Another benefit is that it’s likely I will use the nursery (keeping the spare bed) along with the cot in there, as my husband will be working so we might need to sleep separately occasionally- it gives us the flexibility

My baby is 11 weeks and still doesn’t have a nursery 🙈 it’s a long complicated story but she will be in my room until at least 6 months anyway (probably closer to a year) and I have tons of storage in my room so she has drawers etc for all her things and then she has a corner of the lounge for her toys etc. Even if I had a changing table I don’t think I’d use it in her room all the time, we have a huge dining table so I use that (with her mat) or I do it on my bed 🙈

You're not overreacting at all. I didn't want any mums staying over in the early days. That's family bonding time between you, your partner and baby. Our little boy moved into his own room at 3 months old which is a rarity but I'm glad it was all done as it's the last thing I'd want to be doing after he was born 🙃 plus all of his things were in there ready when he was born so they weren't taking up space else where x

I was so excited to decorate our nursery and putting love and care into it was one of my favourite points throughout my pregnancy. In reality it barely got used before he was 6 months old. I would change him in there but that was about it! I got this amazing arm chair from dunelm which converts into a single bed. The space could still be used as a bedroom before he was born and now we use the chair to feed him ect. I would definitely recommend! X

I could see the frustration but could you do a spare room/nursery? That’s what me and my husband have done as we live in two bedroom! We have a double bed but our babies chest and the decor will be combi nursery and comfortable for guests!

Totally get the nesting urge but absolutely gey where he is coming from too. My mum is helping out in the first week after birth and she's also my birth partner. She's having to sleep in my step sons room and he's going to his mum's. My nursery is no where near complete. I have a place to change her upstairs and the wardrobe for her clothes that's it. I'm 38+1 now. There is no way on earth that she is going to be using the room other than me changing a nappy until she's 6 months at the youngest, so if she comes tomorrow puts us at mid April 2025 so I've taken the pressure off completely.

I get where you're coming from. But I highly doubt you'll be in there much. I'd wait until the baby is a little older and you know their personality and can set the room up best to suit everyone's needs. If you do it now you'll end up not using most of the stuff and then you'll chuck it in about 6 months because baby has outgrown it or other things work better. My partner is so keen on setting up a nursery. I don't see the point until way after about 6months after baby is born.

You’re wanting to nest, the nursery was my obsession… however, you definitely don’t need it for first 6 months anyways so in a way your partner isn’t wrong. But I would be pushing for it to be finished because it would stress me out not being done. Maybe compromise, get everything you need for it and paint it but keep a double bed in there until you need the other furniture?

I agree with your partner here, sorry! Your baby will be in with you for at least the first 6 months anyway, and for daytime naps they will sleep downstairs with you, so there really is no need to rush into doing up a nursery at all! We will starting to prepare our babys room shortly, and she's almost 5 months old!

We started the nursery and my mom was still able to stay in there for two months after baby was born! You can start by just painting and setting up the closet and do the rest after they’ve gone 😊

So with my first I was like you and wanted to the room to be ready before birth, now with my second I am absolutely not touching that room until much later! We have the bare minimum of my and old chest of drawers and wardrobe in the spare room to keep clothes in, but nothing will be painted and the cot isn’t going up until it really needs to this time so we have room for people staying over xx

I'll go against the majority here and say I would rather have the nursery done! We put a lot of time and effort in to the painting, a wall mural, selecting furniture decorations etc and I have absolutely no idea how we would have managed it when baby was actually here. Even though we didn't move her in until she was 1 in the end, I loved having the room for night feeds where staying in bed made me too tired, for tummy time, for nap times when she was older, for contact naps. We made it the best room in the house and I don't think it would have been as nice if it was a rush job. I think the idea that's been said of decorating but holding fire on building a cot and having a bed in there for now would be the best of both worlds 😊

I'd suggest keeping it as it is. It gives one of you a baby free place to catch up on sleep!