How much are your partners learning?

I agree he should want to learn and support on his own accord. It shouldn’t just be on you… I kinda feel like obviously as the pregnant one I’m doing more research than my BD naturally but I always share the intel with my BD so he’s up to date etc. Maybe get your bd to watch videos on caring for baby with you as something you do together. My partner and I watch videos after dinner every now and then which is quite a nice thing to do and spend time together. Then at least you are both learning the same things x

My hubby is the same, says he will watch stuff but never does. Whereas my algorithm on all my socials is babies haha. We’ve got 5 weeks left and I’m praying he will start looking things up, but I think he just wants to wing it, unfortunately you can’t force it. He will just have a shock when little man is here! And I’ll throw him in the deep end haha. Xx

If he’s not doing it now chances are that probably won’t change once baby has arrived. I’ve just accepted that I’m going to be the one to do most of the learning/researching and because of that he’ll usually take my advice and/or suggestions on most things thankfully.

I think men are totally different when it comes to that kind of thing and they don’t become a dad until the baby is born however us mums feel it as soon as we become pregnant. My husband was the same with our first baby, he wasn’t interested in any baby talk or how many weeks I was and comparing it to the size of a fruit lol, now he is the best dad to our daughter, I wouldn’t worry too much

I bought my husband a book as a gift during pregnancy and he has been really enjoying it. He feels a lot more involved and actively asks me questions now. I think he likes that it's his thing to read in his own time and is worded in a better way for him. Written by Dads for Dads. I noticed a huge change after getting him this. The book is called Pregnancy For Men, it's blue with yellow and white writing on the front and it's cheap on Amazon with very good reviews. Maybe that could help?

My partner has come to all the online antenatal classes. Does his own reading/research and looks at products and reviews etc. Not that he retains it all 🤣 asks me questions for stuff we've covered multiple times but still I feel he's really good at wanting to be prepared.

It sounds like quite a naive approach (unless it’s coming from a place of “I feel confident in caring for my child”, which can be a good thing in dads) because the share of care will undoubtedly be unbalanced as you’ll quickly become the ‘expert’ in the baby. It’s also about your own aftercare as well as the baby, like does he understand and appreciate the stages of actual birth? Your recovery plan? NCT would be a good place to start, or the books others have recommended. It is common for the share of care to fall to women but it doesn’t have to be that way and really your partner needs to step up now xx

My husband didn't really do much learning or researching but let's be honest, no amount of learning can actually prepare you for a baby, and every single one of us are learning as we go . He's always been a fab hands on dad doing nappys, bottles etc and with our second he learnt all the folds for cloth nappies as he went along.

there’s a few comedians who do podcasts about being dads and my partner has been really enjoying them. he’s not much of a reader but podcasts when he’s driving home from work really suit. he also makes notes of things i mention that i want to ask the midwife when we see her which means he engages there too rather than it always just being me, i know for him that helped him feel more involved and connected when there’s a lot he can’t do

With my first, my partner watched videos with me and stuff, but he totally only did that for me 😂 and never actively made an effort to watch any himself. It’s so different for them as they’re not carrying the baby and feeling all the hormones/emotions that we are. It only becomes real for them once baby is here! My partner has been the most hands on and amazing dad to my toddler and I’ve always trusted him to care for my little boy as much as I trust myself! I wouldn’t worry, unless he is showing a genuine disinterest x

I’ve done a couple of free “courses” with The Baby Academy. They send you the notes/recordings afterwards so you can re-watch. https://mybabyacademy.co.uk