But of a moan

I’m really sorry for you loss ♥️ and I wouldn’t read too much into this. People can struggle to know how to speak to or act around someone who is grieving. Xx

I’m so sorry for your loss. I’m sure this is beyond painful for you. Personally I would interpret the text as that she intended to come to the funeral and also visit you on either the 6th or 7th.

I interpreted that as “I can come to the funeral, I also can visit you on the 6th or 7th too” I think she was immediately offering more of her company to you

I’m so sorry for your loss, what an awful thing to have to go through. I personally feel the messages seem a bit cold and dismissive but I’m from the north east and I’m used to a much more chatty and excessive style of messaging so maybe that’s just me. Also as others have said sometimes people don’t quite know how to act or what to say. I would judge it by how your messages normally are, if you normally text in a very to the point sort of way then I would definitely just read it as she can do both dates but if your texts are normally more chatty then maybe she is being a bit off about something or a bit withdrawn for some reason. I hope that makes sense xx

So so sorry for your loss, but I'd see it as she's offering you extra support ontop of being there for the funeral.

How terrible, I’m devastated for you and so sorry for your loss. Could she have misread your message perhaps and wasn’t sure whether you were actually inviting her. Maybe when you confirmed by asking if she can’t come to the funeral she understood? x

I clicked the wrong 1 it’s nothing 2 worry about it means she can go 2 the funeral as she put I can come and she also said she can visit u aswell on the 6th or 7th 🙂 really sorry for ur loss 😢

So sorry for your loss.. I honestly read her response as “yes and see you on the 6th or 7th as well”. My grandmother has a similar way of responding. I think the older generation have an interesting way of texting back and may be shorter than an in person conversation. But idk her.

Sorry for your loss. This is the problem when people don't use punctuation, what they mean and how it is interpreted are not always the same. I've she'd said I can come, and visit 6th or 7th, you would have been clear with her intentions. It does sound a bit cold how she's written but I tend to fluff things up a bit

@Lisa oh my! Yes, you’re completely right!! I’ve just re-read and I can see that now.

Firstly I’m so sorry for your loss, and secondly you’re not moaning at all. I’m glad that you reached out to all of us, as the others have said I think she was suggesting she can attend but visit you before or after the funeral.

@Lauren past things around the time of my loss would suggest she was becoming cold. Distancing me basically.

@Chloe I thought this, too, that is her thinking it was just information, not an invitation. ...but she's not just anyone, she's the godmother, and she knows I have a small support network.

@Sarah no worries 🙂

@Monica interesting. I hadn't thought of that. She is older, too. But she has shown in the past she can respond collaboratively. And it wasn't the first time she'd acted like she was distancing herself from me/my loss. I'm inclined to think she was being disrespectful but I will allow the age difference.

@Lisa yes, the Oxford comma issue. It is a valid point and means I'm wavering more than I would

Thanks everyone. I value this.

@Lisa Sorry. It's been niggling at me for a month. She didn't ever clarify that she meant she could also come on the 6th and 7th so that's why I was inclined to think she was originally slyly rejecting the funeral invitation.

To be honest I personally feel that regardless of the way the message were sent or interpreted the fact that you are questioning it says that it does feel distant to you and perhaps a little out of character for the way you would have expected her to react. Maybe reach out to her and just explain that you could do with a little bit of help or support and see what her response is. I know one thing for certain though that in the run up to such an emotional and upsetting time you do not need to be worrying about these sorts of things, I know that’s easier said than done but try to focus on you and surround yourself with people that will support you and be there for you ❤️

So sorry for your Loss

It sounds like they didn't communicate properly. So, it originally sounds like they don't want to go to the funeral. But really, I think they just missed a "," in their writing and what they meant is that they could come to the funeral and see you on either of the two days after... So they wrote: I can come and visit you on the 6th or 7th. But what they meant was: I can come, and I can visit you on the 6th or 7th. That's how I read that anyways, I wouldn't worry about it xx

@Pia she didn't ever clarify that she meant she could also come on the 6th and 7th so that's why I was inclined to think she was originally slyly rejecting the funeral invitation.

I'm fuming tbh