How to break up??

Context: So my boyfriend and I just had our little man 10 weeks ago. We fight as couples do but I have really seen a side to him over the past year I really don’t like and can no longer stand. When someone takes pride in saying they don’t respect you I think it’s really time to go. I have offered therapy, counseling you name it. He has been taking advantage of me for toooo long. I have paid all the bills including rent for both him and his 8 year old son even while I was pregnant he just pays for sports and food for his son. Random things here and there. But nothing really for our son. I have PTSD pretty bad from some terrible past relationships, like so bad I had to change my name and move half way across the country. Any way I know we need to split, it kills me to have my son have to have a broken home but I don’t want him to learn that’s how you treat women as well as my baby daddy is willing to scream and fight infront of him… I tell him to stop yelling not to wake the baby and he tells not to tell him what to do…. Grown as 43 year old who is immature AF. I need help and this may sound dumb but how do I tell him it’s over and to love out without a bomb going off. I take care of my son PRETTY MUCH all the time. I can’t get stuck in a trigger where I’m unable to function due to how he flips out. I also don’t think I can handle being away from my son for us to split time with him. I honestly wish he would just disappear. He doesn’t help with shit just makes it harder. I just want to be happy with my child I have waited so long to have. My feelings toward him don’t matter in this as I’m trying to do what’s best for my little dude. Idk. I can light the match but don’t want to get triggered or my son up in the middle of it. I also don’t want his older son to be homeless or not see his dad because he has no job to get them a home…. Also not my problem…. This might be a rant but faaaaaack

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Yeah it’s time to go and to protect yourself and your baby. Make sure you plan your exit smart though. He sounds like a narcissist from your description so make sure you’re safe and protected. Don’t tell him you’re planning on leaving but get prepared with proper resources for any possible legal actions if he takes you to court. The court system can be super not supportive to moms and to mom and baby connection and so it’s very important to be informed and have a good team and support on your side. I’m sending you much love

@Ola thank you. I’ll start looking into it all to be prepared. Idk what to do in the fact that he needs to leave. This is my apartment and I can’t move due to my credit. Me paying all the bills screwed me financially

Just want to throw out there that you can go to the police station and explain to an officer that you would like to break up with him and tell him he needs to move out but you're frightened of how he will react. They can come sit in with you and ensure you're safety. It made also be beneficial to make lists of everything that's yours that's of importance and plan it for a time that you and baby can go stay elsewhere for a few days so he can get his stuff out without you there

A “broken” home will always be better than an “abusive” home. My only real advise it that when you do it your baby is safely with someone away from where you are. As someone mentioned you can ask that a police officer be there to help whether it’s you moving out or having them move out.

Have someone come over to watch the kids/ be a witness just in case and ask him to another room to have a talk try to keep your composure and just do it. He isn’t doing anything for you so you are losing nothing. You are a strong beautiful queen and you can do this! ❤️❤️

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