Why do I miss him?
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Trauma bonded i get the feeling
It’s a trauma bond, your head leaves before your heart does. But once your heart is there, you’ll question why you ever let it go on as long as you did. It’s horrible to experience.
There’s a lot going on with constant fighting, intense emotions, shared experience, feeling like no one else understands except both of you, endorphins from crying, anxiety maybe even excitement, oxytocin from sex. What made you stay despite being miserable? What did he give you or what about you felt comfortable in that environment. Figure out how to get that from a healthy source No blame or shame, been there myself
I get that feeling, I was with my BD for 6 years and he was horrible to me. Physical, emotional and mentally abusive towards me. But every once in awhile I find myself missing him.
You miss who he pretend to be in the beginning
Chemical bond from having his kid and trauma bond
Dealing with similar emotions