I mean I have a strict no kissing rule. I made it very clear and was nice about to. If they mess up too many times they aren’t allowed to hold the baby
Really sorry this happened it would worry me too, totally reasonable to worry but please try not to stress too much. If you breastfeed I'd say just try feed baby as much as they need and know that your antibodies will keep them as healthy as possible. Keep an eye on them and that's all you can really do And get your partner to have a stern word with her so she understands her mistake! A kiss on the forehead is one thing but on the lips is far too much (I personally don't even do that as the mum!)
@Emmo sometimes colds/cold sores can take time to show symptoms so I think it's reasonable to not allow others to kiss baby / to worry if they do. Don't think it's anxiety related as such
@Hafiza no I know it is normal to not want people to kiss your baby, I think it is fine for people to set boundaries. It is just the wording of "really panicking" which makes me think of anxiety, as the likelihood they would get sick is very low, it is worth worrying but not to the extent it makes you sick, at that point it is something else making you feel that way. I know that health anxiety is very common and we shouldn't ignore mental health.
I definitely understand the worry, I had this rule, and it wasn't followed by my MIL either, and my little one got poorly. But if you are breastfeeding, baby will build some immunity, and if your bottle(formula) feeding keep her well hydrated. Also, have a chat with your MIL or have your partner to remind her of the rule and why you have it.
Why would she get ill unless your MIL was ill? Post-partum health anxiety is normal, but if your baby is healthy there is no reason a kiss would make them sick as long as the MIL was not sick or had cold sores. Have you had anxiety in the past?