Does anyone else feel horribly lonely?

Yes! I struggle to connect with other mums. I have no friends nearby for play dates etc. ❤️‍🩹

Yes!! I ended up losing so many of my friends, missed out on the baby groups and now she’s starting school I’m so out of practice I struggle to connect with the other mums

I feel the same and even worse I moved counties so have to start all over again. I’m hopeful I can make some new friends when she starts school but avoid all the already existing clicks. Also hard with an only because again we are in the minority.

Yes I hated that we missed out on so much. By the time things were getting better I was back at work full time so never met any new friends and my son never made any little friends either. Now it's so hard as I just don't feel like I have the time anymore! X

100%! It was soooo hard!

Hi! It was really difficult for me because I felt a real lack of support (not from Hubbs), and other personal circumstances. I think it was worse being in lockdown, but parenthood in general can be very isolating because you're up lots in the night feeding the baby, they rely on you for so much so there's lots of pressure etc.... What really helped me was making the effort and putting myself out there. I joined a lot of baby and mum groups, tried to make friends in person at play groups, reached out to mum friends who could offer support that I needed. It took time and some friendships that didn't develop, but I've found some amazing people and it's honestly made all the difference

Yes I did It's gets very lonely now as I don't really have any friends that I can talk to. I struggle a lot with this. My sister made lots of friends at her baby classes and they are still friends 13 years later. I feel my daughter misses out as well. I just feel very isolated all the time

Yes I am still bitter about my maternity being ruined -I have made some friends but not in the same way

Absolutly. I've tried to connect with other mums, and for one reason or another it hasn't worked. I have anxiety so it's difficult to strike up a conversation and keep it going. I'm trying to put myself out there more but it's nerve wracking x

Yes I did! I hate that we missed out on so much and couldn’t go to any groups etc. I found it really difficult to make friends with other mums when we were finally able to as I was back at work. Now we have moved areas so literally don’t know anyone!!

Chelsea, I am in completely the same boat as you. It's so bad isn't it

Hi, yea I'm the same. I had my daughter in July 2020 so right in lockdown and I almost lost my mind during mat leave. She's 4 now and I also have a 1 yo son. I don't have many friends at all but you seem like a lovely fun person. I'm always up for the chance to meet someone new and in a similar place in life 😊 x

Same here. I don’t really have friends which is so difficult cause I don’t have any family here. I can’t connect with anyone. And tbh I feel like I don’t have the energy to do so anymore as I’m always drained from work

Very much yes. I have managed to make some parent acquaintances but I am absolutely desperate for one local friend. Just one! One real friend!

Oh it’s so nice to find I’m not totally alone in this. All the mums in my area seem to have so many more friends and feel so much less alone and in need of friendship than I do.

@Clare we moved to our current city in late 2018, so I really just had no friends when the pandemic hit and haven't recovered 😭😭. I'm lucky enough to have loads of friends from other places that I keep in touch with online but I'm so lonely here for sure. I wish my sisters or friends could babysit or just come hang out or the things you can only do when you're physically proximate. I'm expecting again in September and finding someone to watch my existing kids while I give birth has been so weird and awkward.

That’s hard to have no one obvious to ask to look after your kid when you give birth.

Yes!! I lost friends. Have no mummy friends. My son is social and will make friends with anyone. I have no idea where to start x

My children have lots of friends too. I am relieved and happy for them as I was isolated and lonely as a child, but many of their friends mum’s are more interested in free childcare than friendship.

I've found that my kids' friends' mums are super nice but just busy with their own lives. Most of them grew up here and have family and friends from childhood so while they're kind to me, they're not, like, desperate for a new bestie 😂

C

lol, sorry, 2yr old had phone 😅

Yes, I find that with lots of people around me too

I always find to that I make so much effort with people and then the conversation goes downhill or there's no effort on the other side! Frustrating!

I find that too!

I’m hoping I pick up some mum friends when my daughter starts school I’m so lonely and have completely lost everyone it’s hard

I’m hoping for that too, they say it happens

Yes it’s so difficult to make mum friends since having my daughter in lockdown.

So glad someone else feels this way too. I been off on maternity I did want to make mum friends but it felt all odd and I was so useless to not going out with a baby. Hubby and I hope maybe school with be different

I don’t understand when people say they missed out, my son was born in the height of lockdown in May 2020 and we still went to baby groups and swim lessons they were all under the guidance with mask wearing and 2 meters apart from the age of 4 months so by September restrictions were eased to allow this, no shade being thrown here but I just don’t understand how people missed the restrictions being eased and didn’t attend groups x

@Hayley I think it's a combination of the fact that 1. Missing out on 4 months of this stuff can still be rough - I couldn't afford to take more than 4 months, so I didnt get the lifted restrictions 2. Loads of stuff still wasn't open, even if some restrictions weren't lifted 3. Some people might have opted to be more cautious because it was scary having a tiny not-fully-vaccinated baby and not knowing what was going on. Even if you were lucky enough to have leave left in September, it really wasn't a "normal" time for most of us.

I was very cautious that year. I have severe asthma, and chronic fatigue, so I’m more at risk than average twice over. I nearly died of the flu 3 years before the pandemic so I was frightened.

I don’t have any friends as I moved from Scarborough to Barnsley 10 years ago and not made any xx

Some “friends” still haven’t even bothered to meet our son. We made new ones, one locally on this app 😊

Glad you were able to find new friends here on this app

@Hayley I stayed in lockdown from Jan 2020 to Feb2022 as I had high risk pregnancy and premature twins so isolated till they were two.

@Sushma why so long? I had high risk pregnancy and my lo had a operation at 4 months and dr never told us to isolate longer than gov guidance x

@Hayley I think it's just ok to accept that other people had different comfort levels and experiences than you. I'm glad you were able to socialise normally in 2020 but plenty of us weren't.

Oh Shushma, that’s so tough! How are you doing?

@Hayley because I was not comfortable with the vaccine schedule for singletons for my twins so I spaced it out as much as I could and that took about 18months or so to finish and Covid figures were not abating so we carried on isolating .

@Rachel I’m fine with other people’s choices but if it’s your choice you can’t really complain that you missed out because you chose to miss out x

I mean I disagree @Hayley and this is a whole thread of people talking about being sad and lonely about a shared experience of having a difficult time. It's entirely free to just.....let us mourn this without telling us all that it's our own faults. I, as well as plenty of other people, offered various reasons our experiences were different than yours. I'm not sure what your aim is at this point except to make us feel worse and lonelier?

@Rachel a tad dramatic in your response, at no point have I tried to make anyone feel worse I have literally just stated in my original post if you read it that I don’t understand why so many people missed out on baby groups when they were still available once restrictions were lifted, another lady explained why she isolated for so long because I asked her , where in that post am I making people feel bad? Maybe you shouldn’t read people’s comments and such a negative way

Just fyi it turns out you can block people on here. Anyway, sorry to anyone else who had a bad time having parental leave during the pandemic 💜💜

I think it depends on where you live and what was still running. Where I am, there was absolutely nothing open... after my daughter was born, we hardly even saw the HV and she was my 1st! Anyway life has gotten on and now am pregnant with my 3rd due anyday. But i feel so socially lonely. I had 3 solid friends 2 are married out of town and the other is ill. I've always kept a small group close to me. But know I feel like am on my own. Hubby has so many friends and meets them at least once a week! I feel like I have no one besides the kids and from someone who has very independent relying on my husbands company is pretty hard

It has always been very difficult for me to make friends and now that I have 2 kids it has become impossible.