I don’t know what to do 😭😭

It's hard, but you will find yourself and remaining in the same house is always the worst. Was it a mutual decision or one sided

@Jodie it was an argument about him not spending enough time with us as a family and it’s escalated to him now being done saying he wants more and doesn’t want to be controlled. That isn’t what I was wanting to do.. I just didn’t want him to be out so much when he’s already working a lot 😭 so I guess I started argument but he’s ended the relationship 😞

Sounds like he already had these feelings. Men just don't know hiw to grow up and be responsible when they have children. I also had this argument time and time again and I ended up leaving.

@Jodie I feel like I can’t let him go 😭 I didn’t think I’d ever be like this but I feel like I have some sort of trauma bond or something with him because he’s the only person I’ve ever been loved by 😭 even my parents weren’t bothered about me. It hurts because he’s all I had and I feel like I could never walk away hurt how he is, it’s killing me 😞 He’s also saying nasty stuff now like my Parents don’t give a f*** and stuff knowing it will hurt me 😭

You need space from this. I would advise that you focus on your kids as this will help you to not focus so much on him. I may seem like it's out of the blue to you but it sounds like he has been feeling this for a while to have a knee jerk reaction. Why do you and the kids need to leave? Can't he move out even if it was just for a while?

@Kimberley I know I do 😭 it’s killing me all I’m doing is crying 😭 I’m trying to focus on them but when he’s taking them out etc and I’m not there I’m struggling because they’re all I have and I’m missing out 😭 He’s refusing to move out as it’s both our houses so I’m having to get my own place instead

It's really bad that he is making his kids move their home instead of him moving. He sounds really selfish. You won't be able to move on with yourself until you are out of the situation you are in. I can imagine how horrible this must be for you Are you looking at a rental?

I know I said that to him and he just said he couldn’t afford it! He’s so selfish honestly! This is why we fell out in first place as he just thinks of himself 😞 no I’m looking at getting a council property as I’ve looked for private rentals and there’s absolutely none 😩

I really identify with this. I had very similar feelings when my ex husband and I split up. We had a good enough relationship so I never thought he’d want to end things but he did. The first few weeks are the worst but it will get a lot better once you’re not in each other’s space. I also felt like I had no one to talk to as it had always been just the two of us with neither one having family in this country. This was 4.5 years ago and I’m now pregnant and engaged to the most wonderful man. When I was going through it all I found this charity and joined one of their support groups and I found it incredibly helpful as it gave me someone to talk to who could relate to what I was going through. They also have groups for children, which I hope helped my daughter process everything that was happening. https://www.restoredlives.org/ Feel free to dm me if you’d like someone to talk to 🙂

@Fernanda it’s been 6 weeks and we’re still under each others feet 😭 all I want is a hug 😭 Omg that’s amazing that you’re so happy now! So pleased for you! I hope that will be me in the near future 🤞🏻 thanks so much for the link and the offer of someone to talk to I really appreciate it ❤️

If u think he is a narcissist u could check out the n.a.r.c.group on facebook for advice and also for the trauma and insecurity I recommend somatic experiencing therapy via lainey Round or blossom with blaise on facebook xxxx I'm going thru it too and he is so nasty incant have him around our toddler anymore or me so ive gone non contact for a while til I feel I can give him visit rights

@Kt I think he’s just evil to be honest 😞 thanks I’ll look into that! Sorry you’re going through it too! Xxx

Once you make the break and get sorted make sure you don't think about the nice times and miss him. Make sure you think about all the selfish shit he did and then you will be thankful it ended. Trust me, I did

I went through it with my sons dad. Once I got over it and was on the other side, I realised how mentally/emotionally and physically abusive the entire relationship had been for 7 years of my life that I'd always made excuses for because of a rocky upbringing and how much control he ended up having over me, so by the sounds of it, it may not feel like it now, but you'll be better off without him in the long run and just let all the feelings out now, because i promise, hes not worth it if hes not willing to put the kids and mother of his children first for housing. You're more than welcome to message me x

Give yourself a big hug XX you are your best friend

@Kimberley thanks I guess I just miss him 😭 I miss the hugs, I miss feeling safe, I miss the company 😞 it’s so much harder letting go than I thought it would be!

@Naomi sorry to hear you went through it… it’s awful! It definitely doesn’t feel like it now 😭 I’m struggling so bad! Yeah I know I can’t believe he’s making us move out 😞 thanks x