Bit sad

I hear you! But I’m the mum with a baby that doesn’t sleep and breastfeeds 😂 I totally sympathise and understand. It’s hard when you feel like the odd one out but did anything click with the mums? I think mum meet ups from groups etc the commonality it’s the babies so they maybe end up being the topic of conversation! Have you been able to message anyone on the app that’s local to you and they may be more similar? It is tough but your people will be out there and sometimes it’s good to have people that just get it and understand some of what you’re going through xx

Everyone does things differently! Like you say, your bond with your baby is amazing and special and that’s the most important thing. Easier said than done but try not to compare to other people - you are doing amazingly!

Giiiiiirl I would take your mumming anyday ❤️ smashing it. X

@Emily thank you! Tbh I think I might just chill on the whole mum friend thing till he’s a bit bigger and they’re all eating nuggets and being nightmares. I think I felt like I needed to meet people and go out but I think in reality I just need to get a bit of my identity back and do something for me. Hope you get some sleep soon! X

Definitely! Might be better to get some you time with people already in your life without baby for now instead as that’s just as important too xx

You are definitely mummying! And you're doing amazing! Don't compare yourself to others, you are your baby's whole world. Mum friends are great to have but it does mainly contain 'My baby can/my baby can't' conversations. Keep going for nights out, it's healthy x

You are 💯 mumming and I’m mumming just like you are. If you want to chat, feel free to send me a message ☺️

Nah! You do you. This is so hard, I can hardly find a way with the challenges thrown at me, I can't imagine trying to do this differently on purpose. I actually haven't really looked for mum friends because I find baby chat difficult as inevitably one of us is doing something different to the other, which I don't care about as I think you need to work out what's best for you and your baby. I would actually like you much prefer talking non-baby stuff. I've been reading some work stuff when I can just so I can keep my hand in and it really reminds me of my identity. I do however love my job so...I guess I'm a weirdo 🤣 Feel free to message if you want to chat.

@Katie yeah I think it just hit a nerve a bit. My baby has always liked his own space, loved his cot- wouldn’t sleep in our bed and cried to be put down at some points. One mum that night suggested it was due to bottle feeding rather than it being his temperament and it kind of felt like a comment that maybe should’ve stayed in her head. Merrrr

I feel like baby chat is just common ground, you can obvs relate and share experiences/ tips. That being said don’t let the experience from other mums make you feel any certain way about your parenting. Sounds like you’re smashing it!! My little girl still has me up through the night 🫠

That comment definitely should've stayed in her head, what a load of rubbish. There are more ways to bond with a baby than breastfeeding! Some babies just like their space more, and that definitely isn't a bad thing. I guess it just makes those cuddles more special too x

@Hollie aw no I defo get why it happens and I ask about people’s babies if things get awkward. It just opens up the door to comparison and can leave you feeling poo for no good reason. I think I just haven’t found anyone on my same wave length that I can talk to about shit telly and food! One day..

I’m exactly the same as you… formula feeding, baby sleeps in her own room and we have a set routine (which I love). Message if you ever want to chat ❤️ I find this new mum world really hard to navigate, it’s like being back at school 😔

Do not compare yourself. As long as you and baby are happy and healthy don’t worry about them. My girl is bottle fed, she sleeps in her own room, I don’t do baby led weaning, I feed her. I also do the cry it out method, guess what my girl is happy and thriving! So who cares about others?! Keep going mumma you are smashing it x

I have never co slept with my baby, I was too scared too also we have a dog so it’s not safe incase he comes on our bed. I wasn’t able to breastfeed, we have rough routines and she is in her own room and sleeps well. I would feel uncomfortable in that situation as well but no one else’s opinion really matters. If they look down to you for how you are with your children then I wouldn’t even talk to them

I hear you. There is definitely no one definition of mumming. If you are happy overall and so is your bub then you are doing lots right. The struggle for friendship can be frustrating. I definitely find myself talking about my baby nowadays but also really appreciate any candid conversation and it can be hard to break down barriers!

My little girl is nearly 7 months sleepy in her own room since 3 months old and slept through is also bottle fed and we have a set routine also so you can message me anytime 🥰

Coming from a co-sleeping, breastfeeding, no routine mama... what you're doing is amazing! I co-sleep because from day one I did it by accident and then realised it was easier so just went with the lazy option, I breastfeed because my baby has fully refused bottles up until a couple of weeks and now refuses formula so pumping is just too complicated, and I have no routine cos my little nutter won't keep to one 😅 But I would more than love to put my baby in a cot in her own room, bottle feed her so someone else can take the load I've been carrying for 6 months and have her in a routine so I can stop tracking every little thing she does to know what she'll need next 🤦‍♀️ The grass is always greener on the other side so if you're happy the way you are please don't beat yourself up, there is no perfect in this mumming job and I think the hardest thing about it is accepting that

This is why i don’t go to mums groups because i know there will be THIS what you have described 💀 I would vibe with you anytime as we are the same ♥️ love talking other things than baby, sleeping separately through the night and bottle feeding. My baby is my bff and our bond is everything👌

@Masha yeah you’re right! I don’t learn either 😂. Every now and again I’m like oh maybe it would be nice to meet a group of people going through similar things then I instantly regret it. 🤪🤪 I don’t need it so need to stop punishing myself 😂 Feels like a needle in a haystack finding anyone locally that’s a bit fun, chill and has a baby lol. Hope you’re good anyway!

I tried my best with it all too. Each time i do i too regret it. No more for me. There is no hope or light at the end of this ‘exclusively breastfeeding cosleeping and add whatever else goes with it’ tunnel 🤣 Somehow all little humans grow into adults in the same way with same amount of love from their parents and this stuff doesn’t matter in the end yet the judgement is wild for no reason at all. Truly hard to find local non entitled moms out there with whom spending time can be easy and you can be authentic. In a way perhaps because they think we have it ‘unnatural and easy?’ (let them think what they want!) they don’t like it and so misery likes company and we are not their company.

Aw this is like me, my boy is 7 months old, sleeps through the night since 3/4 months (we did have a small regression but wasn’t too bad) he has his routine which we aren’t super fixed on but we like to keep it to that, has his food which I started from 4 months and now he has 3 full meals a day, has been bottle fed since 2 months old because it was just getting difficult for me. A happy baby is best, as long as you know you’re doing your most for him that’s all that matters, everyone parents different but you do what works for you! 🩷