I Want My Baby to Myself

i think thats normal. i hate sharing my baby with my boyfriends family and when pregnant dreaded it. not so much my boyfriend though. if you took your baby out of the equation would you want to be with your partner?

You might have post partum anxiety

I totally understand how you feel

@Lys ❤️‍🔥 I’m sorry.

@ellie 🤍 Thank you. I would absolutely not be with my partner if it weren’t for our baby.

@Laurie I think so. I’m even anxious when it’s just the 3 of us at home and my partner is holding our baby for too long. I get very sad or depressed about it.

This must be very difficult. I'd suggest speaking to your GP or health visitor if you can.

You need to reach out for help. I completely understand feeling protective of your baby, but this isn’t fair on your partner, or baby. Your baby deserves two parents that get to care for it, and 2 families that love it. And your partner has just as much right to your baby as you, and just as much say over who gets to go around baby. Anxious parents create anxious babies. Reach out for help x

It’s typically never a good idea or way to live if your staying with your partner just because of a baby I am a child of parents that stayed together far too long just for the sake of the kids and my brother and I were sooooo happy when they finally separated

I would reach out to a professional. It’s normal to want your baby back when someone is holding them, but you should be able to trust your partner watching them

I understand the dread when it comes to partners family, because they were horrible to me while pregnant and there's still a lot of resentment. But with partner I'm comfortable. It did take a bit of time to get that comfort, like I was very anxious when she was out of my sight. But I don't have those feelings now

Has your partner or his family done anything to make you feel this way? Are they irresponsible or in any other way unfit to care for baby?!

This was me 100% I’d just birthed this tiny human after carrying him for 9 months. I resented his dad for not ‘being pregnant’. Which sounds ridiculous. But I was just struggling with it all. I wanted to watch my son 24/7. Didn’t want anyone else to touch him or hold him. For me, it got better. So much better. I love watching my son with his dad now. I’m so glad we never split up as this shits hard 😂. I never got professional help, but I wish I had as it took me a while to come to terms with it all. I would recommend help. But I also wanna say don’t give up on your relationship if this is your only issue. It’s so worth it in the end, in my opinion. The first year of babies life is the hardest on your relationship. Sometimes I still get bouts of jealousy. But that’s mainly when my son prefers his dad 😂 then sometimes I wish he preferred his dad 🤣

If your baby is still only a couple of months old it completely normal to go a bit mental

That’s weird, sounds like you need help. It isn’t healthy for the baby to not create a bond with their father, they need a father as much as they need a mother. So technically you’re not giving the baby what they need by keeping them away from their dad.

If you wouldn’t want to be with your boyfriend if it weren’t for you child you may want to reevaluate your relationship and decide what to do. But I also think you should look into some counseling for post partum anxiety. I had this fear and issue for the first 8 weeks of my baby life and it really messed with me and wasn’t fair to my baby at all. My son deserved to be around his dad and get love and attention from his dad and family and I kept wanting to take that away from him out of my own fear. It’s hard to do I know but your baby deserves more love than just you, and if these people are not bad people then your child deserves love from them too! All I wanted was him to myself and honestly wanted to runaway with my son. But I saw him smile with his dad. I saw him smile with his grandparents and uncle and aunt. And that right there showed me that my son needed more than just me and that he would benefit from it. I had to put my feelings aside for what’s best for him.

It’s beyond hard but seek the help you need and you can get through this!❤️

Yes

I felt this way, turns out I was struggling with severe PPA. Doing much better now. Very pleased to hand baby over to dad and his family when I need a break or have some me time.

@Adrianna Not keeping him away, it’s just the awful feeling I get when my baby is with him. I suppress it, but it’s there.

What helped me is honestly taking the my baby mindset away and made it “our baby” me reminding myself daily it’s his baby too and he loves and cares about him helped so much. When I always said my baby only it was a very possessive term but I needed to remind myself how important the father is and that it’s a team

@Allison They love our baby and are good to him, but they are very unhygienic (no washing hands after using bathroom and things like that), and thinking of the germs they’re transferring to my baby is peak anxiety for me.

@Brooke Thank you! ❤️

Can you ask them to wash their hands before holding the baby?! Like others have suggested I would seek professional help, it would greatly benefit your baby to be surrounded by family that loves them as well as a healthy, happy mom! I’m very protective over my baby as well but not when it comes to dad. I know that dad is just as good of a parent as I am. I’m beyond grateful to watch their relationship flourish everyday getting in between that is a disservice to the baby.

Im not a single mom but I’ve related to this and it’s most likely PPA (Postpartum anxiety) I literally couldn’t Even let my own mother (even though she has 5) take care of him when he was a newborn because I felt like she wouldn’t give him the care and consideration to the extent that I, his own mother, would. But I absolutely love an adore my partner (even though I felt like he couldn’t take care of him either) but honestly as first time parents it’s just all around scary! My partner has grown and is growing as a father and I love to see it. His family also respects all of my wishes as well as does mine. Have you voiced you wishes to them?

Thank you, everyone. ❤️