How do you do it? TEACH ME! 🤣
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When a struggle comes up, I've turned it into an opportunity to reflect on how I could best concure the situation and be someone I look up to and can rely on.
@Klara LOVE this response!! That's definitely motivation. I don't want my LG to think I'm lazy etc 🥹.. I need to get myself out of this cycle of complacency. Ugh, any tips on where to begin? 🫣
Hm. Definitely start small. You do not want to set yourself up for failure. Also, if you can make it fun, bonus. What bothers you the most? The thing that you feel most ashamed of? For me, I felt my inability to communicate well was holding me back in my relationships and at work. I started listening to videos and podcasts about communication and would force myself once every weekend to find a conversation to practice with(a work conversation, asking a stranger at the coffee shop to judge how clear and confident I was, etc.) It's even better if you have someone who is willing to be painfully honest with you. My husband will tell me bluntly when I am being too cowardly and letting my people pleasing get in the way of building true meaningful relationships or getting in the way at work.
Something small could be that I'll ride my bike to the post office instead of taking my car. Or I may be tired, but if I do the dishes tonight after laying baby down, our morning will run so much smoother, and morning me will thank evening me. Honestly, maybe the best thing is to pause every morning, write down what you have to do(be reasonable), and look for one way to do something better that day. Do it every morning, and then it will be second nature to look for solutions and better ways. If you stop, close your eyes and really focus on how great it will feel when you meet those small goals or even big goals that helps a lot. Really internalize the change. Sorry, this isn't my strength, so I am all over the place on you.
Why assume that you should be driven the way that other people are? What do you like? What do you do all the time that no one would have to pay you for? We all are motivated by something so to say your not driven is not true. You’re just not driven to spend your life working in your current field. If you found something that paid you to do what you absolutely love, you would be driven too. Not to mention, some of us are driven by the trauma of an overcritical parent and so we are anxious, people pleasing perfectionist l, masking as ambitious. Find your thing.
@Klara great reading this because I struggle with communication too. I would turn down a promotion if it involves providing too much weekly updates to different groups etc
@Klara I struggle with conversations too 🥹.. I create to do lists but I don't always get through them. Thank yooou, this was very helpful 💕
@Lativa that's true. Maybe finding what my thing is, is the real struggle 🥹😩
I agree that finding your thing is great, but I also believe that you can improve yourself, grow, and become someone you are proud of on the way. You can still enjoy taking on your day without knowing some perfect happy place between what you enjoy and what is helpful/useful in your life or in a career. I believe this is important because I wasted so many years because I didn't know "what I wanted to be when I grew up." I still fill my days with things I enjoy, but I also enjoy the things I have to do because I've made sure they are things that contribute to what matters to me and I have more energy for them.
Oh! Something I heard that helped pull me up when I am dragging- "Don't fear not reaching your goal today. Fear being exactly where you don't want to be forever."
It's a mindset thing. It takes work to get into the mindset, but it is definitely the mindset. I get excited about things like having a retirement and knowing I'm not going to burden my son with my care when I am old. I get excited about being a great role model in self care and taking care of responsibilities even when I don't feel like it. It comforts me, knowing I am not a burden to my family and loved ones. It empowers me to know that if everything fell on my shoulders, I could rise to the occasion.