Mixed feelings
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Sorry that you’re going through this difficult wave of emotions. Remember to give yourself plenty of grace. Your body has been through a lot physically and mentally. 28 is still young in my eyes. I’m sure with time you’ll find a rhythm that suits you. Sending you much need positive vibes💖
Anything that is worth anything in this life takes lots of work. You might have enjoyed all those things you did, but honestly, these things were kinda shallow and someone's life just being about hanging out with friends and looking cute, having fun etc, is quite sad and pathetic, but our culture says it's good to be a 30 year old teenager 🤷🏻♀️ it's actually good that you are taking upon yourself this noble task of raising another human being, and although it's hard, it will make you a better person if you embrace the hardship and do your best to be a responsible adult instead of a grown teenager. Btw, I have two kids and when I get overwhelmed I also think it was a mistake, but I 100% know it wasn't a mistake, when I have a clear head I can see they are great and this is a noble task. It does get easier after the first year, and eventually they will be older and more independent and you get more time for yourself.
Completely normal. I was reading something the other day about mourning your life pre baby. Because you have to say goodbye to it in a way. You'll be able to do things again of course but it will always be different to pre baby. I definitely had a few moments probably about 4 weeks in where I was like. Dear god. We have a baby. That's it, we're stuck now we're always going to have a child to look after! But now I'm looking forward to it more. I've tried to find ways of doing things that I like doing taking any help I can get. If you have friends, family who can give you an hour here and there, take it. Sleep, have a shower, anything. I've had a couple of medical appointments I've had to go to and had to get friends or family to take her, I need to do it to look after myself, but the same applies mentally. I could have just as easily taken that hour to go for a massage, or go shopping, or take myself for a coffee. I appreciate it's much harder if you don't have anyone around to help. But if you do, use it!
This is completely normal. I’m on my second now, my oldest is 3 next month. You will definitely feel like yourself again with time ❤️ you will get to do all those things you listed again and appreciate it more ! that must be tough doing it mostly on your own. I hope you can find support in other people ?