Do not disturb

I’m a single mom to an 8 week old baby boy and I just can’t bring myself to reach out/reply to my friends and people who check in on me anymore. I’m trying to embrace new motherhood, but it’s taken a conscious effort for me to practice gratitude and contentment in this new role. I think I’ve started avoiding friends/extended family because 1. I don’t want to overwhelm them with my circumstances/feelings every time we talk, but I also don’t have the energy to mask. 2. Talking to them is a reminder of how different things are and I’m still struggling to accept this new reality. I haven’t even been opening their messages or returning calls at this point. Has anyone experienced this? If so, what was most helpful for you? And please don’t chalk things up to PPD. I see moms do that a lot, and although it’s a very real and common condition, being a new mom is a HUGE adjustment and it’s unfair to throw a label at every “symptom” that comes with navigating this change💚

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It's okay to want to be able to focus on your new life and feel certain ways about your old life and I hope eventually you can enjoy your friendships again I've only talked to a few people and they're mostly mother's themselves so they understand what is going on I think the most helpful thing is accepting what is and finding the good in what you're experiencing... Most women would love to be able to experience motherhood but they can't, so I try to be grateful even if it's hard

This might be not good advice it just works for me, dont try to focus on all the missed calls at once, pick one and nurture that relationship and be honest with them, if they arent accepting or yall dont vibe anymore move on to the next person and if you lose people hey its less missed calls on ur end

I hid away and ignored everyone except my mum in the early days. I do this anyway tbh when I go through stages of anxiety or overwhelm so the people close to me know this about me. I did tell some people that I’m adjusting still and will get back to them when I’m feeling a bit more settled. Try that maybe? In time I felt more “normal” but in those tough days when I felt like I was drowning talking to my mum helped as she has been through it before and reassured me that my feelings were normal. So, definitely take the time you need to yourself but consider confiding in someone too, I don’t think that you’re overwhelming anyone at all. This is your life now and it’s really hard to adjust of course you’d be talking about it! I would try to choose someone who has had children themselves as it’s hard to really understand if you haven’t I think.

@Olivia thank you so much!💚 I pushed myself to respond to one text and it actually felt better than leaving the message unread (and causing an anxiety build up😬)

Thank you for responding so thoughtfully and honestly💚 It’s crazy how different life looks through the eyes of motherhood. I can’t believe women have been walking around as functional adults+moms!!None of my friends are moms so maybe that’s why it’s hard to open up about the struggle of this ongoing adjustment

Here for advise because I'm literally doing the exact same thing. When you said that you don't want to burden people with your circumstance but you don't have the energy to mask...that is me COMPLETELY! I've just stopped answering the phone, answering texts, everything. I think it's honestly just the new mommy stress. A friend of mine told me that the first 3 months is the "4th trimester", and in that period, nothing feels right or normal. She insisted that you start feeling better after the 3 month mark. My daughter is 10 weeks old today to I'm going to hope that she is right.

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