Child support

I’m going through the same thing with my boyfriend and step son as well. Haven’t seen his son in 6 months because of her lies and manipulation, child support is mostly based off of lies, and she tries to use it all to her advantage. Custody, parenting time and child support. Love that you’re by his side helping him stand up for himself and getting what’s best for his child. 🤞🏼

I should do this. Proud of you girl 🙌 It’s really sad watching drama go down and the kids are suffering the most.

@Rema @Airianna honestly. It was so uncomfortable. I didn’t want to be there. My anxiety was through the roof. I had to practice some serious self control seeing her face because she has just put us through hell over the last 4 years. And I didn’t even go in the room. I didn’t want to. I stayed in the waiting room. My presence was enough and I was able to help him with paperwork. When they got called into the room she said to the mediator “she can’t come back here.” I didn’t even try to, but guess what. Once we are married and his income becomes our income and joint accounts I will be going back there come hell or high water. She’s allowed to have her “women’s advocate” why can’t he have support? She’s trying to get blood from a stone. If he had more, he’d pay more. But he doesn’t, and he already pays an ungodly amount (imo).

Also- I just wanted to add I can’t speak for you guys but his ex is truly the definition of bitter and mentally ill. If you’re in a custody battle, demand a mental eval. Even if you have to pay for it. That’s what we are going to do because she has hurt my ss time and time again to punish us and make herself happy.

Your situation sounds so similar to mine, minus me and my bf not being engaged 😭 She’s dragged him in and out of court for more and more child support, changing visitation even telling them he doesn’t deserve overnights or that I’m a danger to their son because i “try to poison him” but yet shes had him in the ER more times than i can count for an allergic reaction and that’s never happened with us. Then at times claiming she needs more money because he currently has no overnights, but when he asks for his court ordered time with his son she tells him that he can’t get him because they’re busy and have plans and he can’t be around me. 😂 She even filed for more child support a week after our baby was born last year because she was mad he wouldn’t sleep with her yet after begging my entire pregnancy lol, and got $1,100 a month for 1 child. It’s sick. We struggle as well because of it. With household bills, vehicles, groceries, etc, plus our kids here we have on a daily basis.

I completely understand your anxiety getting bad in that situation, i get like that too after being put through hell for 5 years. It’s terrible but you’re both very strong for standing up to her and doing what needs to be done. Also, if she’s able to have an advocate in the meeting with her, he should be able to have one too. So both parties have an even playing field instead of one having an unfair advantage. If there’s ever another situation like that, I’d push for one. & how were you able to get a mental evaluation for the other parent? We deal with my oldest daughter’s father and also his oldest son’s mother and they’re both bitter and evil and mentally ill. So i could use this info.

@Airianna very similar it’s insane! We haven’t done court for custody yet because she was allowing every other weekend and once a week. She took the once a week away. Then she took our past weekend away because “he was with your girlfriend not you.” I’m scared to death she’s going to make up crazy lies and accusations to get what she wants. It scares me to death because then what? I actually posted here in this group about it. Now it’s the child support. She wants more and more and more. The system is also not made for dads. It’s crazy everything she gets away with. I could go on for ages.

@Airianna she’s not fit to have sole custody of that child. She literally can look at him and sway his decision. She puts guilt trips on him. Whispers stuff to him. She has a 27 year old son (different father) that smokes weed all day and lives with her and will even shit in the bathroom while she’s showering. The child in question still sleeps in bed with her, she wipes his ass (he’s 8). She’s just very clearly mentally unstable. I’ve known her for years and she flat out said over her dead body will I ever be near her son because “you slept with the father of my child and we don’t do that here.” She grills the child when he gets home. Keeps him from us as punishment. When he goes for custody he already told his lawyer he wants a mental eval done on her and the child to prove the mental abuse

She signed him up for soccer on our weekends which hinders our time. She said to the child she doesn’t care who takes him to soccer as long as he goes. I took him every time (fiance is working weekends to pay her ungodly amount of support). Well she wasn’t happy with that and refused to let him come this weekend because HE should be taking the child to soccer.

Wow, that’s not right at all. If the child isn’t in any danger, she should not be manipulating him when it comes to his other parent and significant other. The courts won’t let her get away with that if there’s proof. I’d definitely fight the amount if it’s affecting his time with his child and he doesn’t even get any weekend time. I also work side jobs to make money to help us out where i work on my own schedule, i do Walmart Spark on the side and sometimes Instacart which helps here and there. And if it’s not the child completely spending the entire visitation period with you or someone else, i still think dad is entitled to his time whether you’re taking him to soccer for an hour or two or not and then dad gets his time afterwards. That would be a violation if he doesn’t get him for his court ordered time because she just doesn’t let him.

And I’d also ask the courts if she’s even allowed to do that. If the order was already in place for him to have his weekends, and mom purposely signed him up for something that falls on dad’s time dad would still have him during that time but be the one to take him. She can’t make any decisions or additional obligations if the child is not supposed to be with her.

@Airianna the best part is I knew her before him. They were already seperated at that point for a while. She used to ask me to watch the child, I took him places with my kids, everything lol. She got close to my ex at the time and I caught them coming out of the bathroom together at a bar. I didn’t even give it a second thought because he was my ex. Well a couple years later my now fiancé and I ran into each other at a restaurant I was at with my girlfriends, and we’ve been inseparable ever since. I apologized to her, shit happens, I get it, but oh well. You were fine with me being near the child before, I was a great person before, but now magically I’m a demon.

I was in a similar situation like that as well too. My first child’s dad and i were together on and off for 7 years, and when we broke up he got with one of my best friends that i grew up with and got her pregnant. I hated her and was mad for so long, about 2 years. But after that i got over it because i was tired of being angry and my daughter loves her brother. And honestly, now i coparent better with her for our kids than i do with my own kids dad lol. At some point you gotta let certain things go that you can’t change and put the kid first. That’s what she needs to do. But at this point he just needs to fight it out for the time being in court because a lot of this is just her bitter feelings which has nothing to do with the safety or wellbeing of the child. He’ll win in the long run and the courts will catch on.