Getting out and about
Show your support
It’s definitely harder to make friends as you get older. I’ve noticed that too. Or maybe it’s just the world post covid ? I can totally relate though, as I just don’t even feel comfortable in my body after having two kids in two years and none of my regular clothes fit so whenever I need to go out that adds a layer to it. Even just going to the food store I’ll post pone sometimes much that it gets so late I just do an online order (but it’s a lot more money so I really try not to). So you’re def not alone!
@Angela I’ve had the same experience for the most part. I also take my kids to storytime at local libraries and sometimes there will be a mom that talks to me…seems like if the kids play together more than the parents will sometimes talk to me because we talk about our kids. I want to approach people sometimes but I also don’t want to bother them, maybe they’re feeling the same? I do feel like it’s hard these days. Everyone feels lonely but no one wants to really talk to anyone else when they’re out, so it’s a catch 22. I just think the world is a really different place today than it was 5 or 10 years ago when we were still in school or maybe some of us were working whereas we don’t now that we have kids, etc. I hope as they get older and join sports and clubs that their friends parents will be my friends. It would be nice to have just a couple good mom friends…
@Laura yeah that's true but around here most people are already part of a group so breaking into one seems to hard. Unless I was working, it's just so hard to find other adults to chat to I think. Being a mother makes things a little easier if someone else is one too but still I wish it was easier than it is these days.
@Laura covid probably has a lot to do with unfortunately. I just find it really hard the one group i did go to was really clicky.... I've also found that other mums can be really judgey (this has just been my experience I'm sure not everyone is like this) but yeah maybe like you say might have something to do with my anxiety perception of myself. The loneliness is horrible sometimes
Yeah, it’s been my experience that other moms can be judgey. Not all, but i just put my 2.5 yr old daughter (my eldest child) into nursery and there are a couple parents that seem nice (but shy) there and the ones that talked a lot seemed kinda judgey and the director of the school is very gossipy. I even found out I knew women that used to teach there and they left in the last couple years because the director was so gossipy (I found that out after I enrolled and paid for my daughter unfortunately). But yeah, then also a lot are in groups already too, so why would I want to be the new one in a group and probably ultimately get left out? That kind of happened with my neighbors. They’re very nice but typically in their 40s and 50s with teenagers or grown children and they invited me to Christmas parties and such but I felt very left out and then they have other get togethers where I’m not invited but I see the pictures on social media…so yeah i totally hear everything you both say
If they're clicky or dont engage, they're not interested today. And that's ok. Next week might be better. Keep your eyes and mind open to meeting other moms, and it will come. Ask them a question about their experience. People love to talk about themselves. A good conversation has give and take. Maybe they talk the whole time, and then they gotta run. You'll get your chance to talk next time. I've been to many mom groups and play groups in my small town. And having a great experience. I'm also extroverted and make nice with just about anyone anywhere. Does that make them insta friends today? No, but maybe next time.
I'm almost 34 weeks pregnant with my 5th child, and I honestly never went to any baby classes. I did attend a breastfeeding support group once after my first child. I've just gone to local parks. I hear that libraries will hold different "classes" for different age groups. Weather it's toddler dance, or art activities for such n such age, things for seniors, etc. It's free. You just need to register. But, it's crazy times in the world, so I understand why most stick to themselves and stay home more now than ever.
Mm when I go to playgroups I just play with my kids or sit down and watch them. No one approaches me and I tried making friends and it never stuck. I'm happy just occasionally talking to people but I prefer to do my own thing.