Says he’s an empath but maybe a narcissist?

I wouldn’t even say that’s a narcissist necessarily, just sounds like someone who doesn’t know how to regulate their own emotions

@El most likely, they do things like start talking bad or down on but try to make it sound like a general statement about the other person like for example a sahm having a breakdown from being burnt out he’ll then get upset because moms upset then he’ll be in a bad mood and say stuff to the kids like “now I gotta go to work in a bad mood I can’t just laze around at home all day”

Yea could potentially be a narcissist sounds like he’s emotionally immature and kind of an Ahole, I’m sorry if you’re having to deal with that :/

Sounds like he lacks emotional regulation skills

@Raqi definitely does, it’s like no one’s allowed to be in a bad mood around him because he always has it worse and other people just make him miserable

It just sounds like he hasn't moved past the toddler stage in terms of regulating his own emotions. So neither an empath or a narcissist. Just an immature person.

I would just say self-centred rather than a narcissist. Like he obviously feels like his feelings matter more than everyone else's.

It sounds like the original person in the bad mood is taking out their bad mood on the other person so they in turn get in a bad mood and it just ends up in a cycle. It’s normal for couples to take out their frustrations on one another at times but it doesn’t make it right. Sounds like both need to self reflect and talk about what’s happening/coming up for them both.

@Cam the thing is nobody takes out their bad moods on him, yes it’s a couple thing sometimes and i definitely take blame when/where im wrong but even when he’s not involved he makes it about him

Just read your previous comment to someone else with your given example. It sounds like he’s undermining your position as a SAHM and what you do, and is taking your bad mood out amongst himself and making it personal. It’s like in some way he’s hearing you’re ungrateful for what he does because he thinks you have it easy so when you are upset he doesn’t understand why and takes it as a personal attack to himself. I wouldn’t say he’s a narcissist for this it honestly just sounds like you both are miscommunicating about a number of things. Like just cause you said orange he could hear the fruit when you’re talking about the color. Imagine this, he goes to work all day and comes home looking forward to seeing you, you’re in a bad mood because you had a tough day, naturally he notices that and feels at fault, you express to him it’s not him it’s a,b,c. Because he thinks you have it better than him he feels like you’re saying he has it better because he doesn’t have to deal with abc which

isn’t true, but it’s what he’s hearing as in his interpretation of your feelings not what you’re actually feeling. Then that makes him feel small and like his actions are unnoticed which in turn makes him feel devalued. It’s a bit emotionally immature sure! But it’s also you two not effectively communicating and truly hearing what the other person is saying and needing in those moments. In a way it’s unfair to you both tbh.

@Cam i completely agree which is definitely why i try to tone it down around him it was also his idea for me to be a sahm and any time i offer to contribute in some type of way he immediately shuts me down. But it’s also hard to tone it down when he does barely anything aside from work, he has 3 days off a week and spends them buried in his phone for 90% of the time, he hates going out and doing things, he gets mad when I discipline the kids but I’ll be telling them nicely to stop and redirecting them multiple and multiple times while they’re not listening and he’s sitting 5 ft away on the phone not paying attention and after fighting with the kids for however long occasionally I lose my cool and yell “STOP” then he’ll look up from the phone and get mad saying that I need to learn how to control myself and the kids only act bad because I don’t handle them properly. And we’ve talked about it before but even our conversation that are meant for communication become about him.

I want to say, I understand I’m not perfect and as far as the relationship goes I can definitely improve but I’ve also put in a lot of work to improve over the years and I’m significantly better at handling myself compared to even this time last year. I don’t put 100% blame on my partner as that would be untrue and wrong of me, but it seems like he’s unwilling to work with me unless everything is 100% his way and nothing less and when it doesn’t go that way he blows up

Neither. Just a man who lacks emotional regulation skills

@El What El said. A true narcissist wouldn’t even take the time to hear another out about their emotions.

My hubby is this way. He has NO emotional regulation skills. And he’s so stubborn he refuses help currently. 😅 Ever need an understanding ear, feel free to message!

Empaths aren't real. More likely, poor emotional intelligence and regulation. He should probably get some help with that.

You are not alone. *hugs*

Neither? He sounds self absorbed

so many people i’ve met who’ve said they’re empaths turn out to be the complete opposite once i get to know them lol