Help

With someone that is going through infertility I would want my friend to tell me face to face and trust me she won’t be awkward. I would be happy for her but sad for myself and I think bringing it up would help her cope. 😅

I’ve only had the one miscarriage but if it was me I’d much rather a message. I hate crying in front of people and I’d much rather have the space to deal with any sad emotions I might feel in private.

I've had 2 losses and when my sister fell pregnant she sent me a message so I could deal with it however I wanted and in my own time rather than having to react in front of her. I think if you say that in the message she will really appreciate you thinking of her 🧡

She should be happy for you.. I understand it’s hard for her however, her story shouldn’t dictate you being excited about your baby xx

You might be overthinking it. Also have your friend check her progesterone. A lot of miss carriages are due to that. I learned that the hard way. I had 2 myself.

I haven’t been in this situation but I would message her instead of face to face. It will give her the opportunity to react whichever way she want’s without pressure. I would message her before all your friends too so she isn’t overhearing others talk about it.

I was always told to message a friend who is struggling so that they can digest the information alone and then meet up when they have come to terms with it. It can be hard for them to share your joy at first so give them the time and space.

I went through this same exact thing with my friend. It wasn’t planned and she was trying for a good 3 years. I told her over a text, she said by the text of me Saying “I have something to tell you” she already knew. And I told her and told her why I was saying something to her. She wasn’t upset about it at all. And told me She understood. Crazy enough… she got pregnant 5 months later!!

@Toya she will be happy for her, but sad for herself. It’s possible to feel more than one emotion and I think that’s acceptable given her circumstances.

Congratulations! Definitely text but say why you’re doing it, ie to give her a chance to absorb the information and not feel under pressure to react a certain way. To those saying ‘she should be happy for you,’ of course in an ideal world that would be all she would feel, but human beings are complicated and are capable of having both positive and negative emotions at the same time. Try not to take it personally if she is upset, and don't make jt about you. Our son was stillborn, our first baby, and it took a while to conceive our rainbow baby (odd, as our first and third were conceived very quickly). Ttc our rainbow was the darkest period of my life and I was very angry at the world. Everyone around me seemed be having babies and although that made me happy it also made me grieve hard for my son and made me feel that I wasn’t good enough. Unless you've been through loss it's difficult to understand. But you seem like a caring friend who wants to protect her x