Travel abroad to see my mom

I live 8000km away from my birth country. I have a direct flight to my birth town with average 16 hours traveling in total. My mom moved away from our birth country and I have 3 flights and approx 26 hours traveling to get to her place. I work from home and have a nanny 4h a day to watch my son while I work. I work a total of 6 hours a day (baby is with his dad the other 2 hours of the day) My mom offered me that I can go to her house with our nanny and that she would host and pay food for her so she can watch my son while I work. Like she expect me to pay our nanny full time and also her flight ticket (plus our tickets of course) to visit her because she can't watch my son for 6 hours a day. Only her flight ticket would be 1300€. She is 62 years old. My son is 13 months. I mean, the flight is A LOT in time and it's crazy to do with a 13 months old (I can't sleep at all while on public place with him) and also why would I invest crazy amount of money because she want to see her grandson but not watch him? Also, I have absolutely zero help when I m there. So it's just exhausting. Mind you she has money and also doesn't work and have plenty of time. She is healthy but she act like if she was 80. What would you think about that if you were in this situation? What would you do?

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Could you not take annual leave so you aren’t working whilst on holiday visiting family? I say this because maybe she thinks you’ll want the nanny so you can work but if she realises you are on holiday not working then you don’t need the nanny. My family live 10,000 miles away and I regularly visited with the baby from 8 weeks old. The flights the easy bit, being home with family is the hard bit 😂

Yes. That's the things. We also want to experience travel in places as a family and not take all of our free time to be at my mom place where we definitely already know everything around. I've already travelled there twice for a total of 2 months since my baby's born. Now I gonna be back at work and I won't have so much time... And indeed, being in the family is just exhausting. I mean no one really help in my family. So I'm alone with my kid and also caring for our food (unless for dinner where there's always food which is great). I m alone there as my husband can't take so much time out of work and I have to watch my son on my own with sleepless night and also care for my own food. Now what is basically expect Is me going there, bring a nanny and pay for it (except her food), make my life way harder so they can enjoy being a little with my son. I like visiting my mom. That's not the point. The point is that when could really make an effort watching my son for 6h a day (as she wantd to spend time

With him right?). I think expecting me spending 5000€ for a 2 weeks visitation is just insane.

Totally understand. Expecting visits at great cost is something I’m struggling with with the older family members. Who are retired and have lots of disposable income but won’t come to us 🤦🏼‍♀️ I’d maybe say that you’ve done months of visiting this year so will assess in 2025 what you can do with both of your works. Leave the ball in her court to visit this time. Good luck!

Thanks @Sarah 😊🙏

Why can’t she come to you??? Unless there is a valid reason she can’t travel it would make more sense for her to travel to you as it’s so difficult traveling with a little one.

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