If u have ever resented ur husband a lot, how did u get over it? Can u get over it?

If he was willing to change, go to therapy and treat you how you deserve to be treated then I would recommend you to do some therapy too. But you can’t expect to get over something that’s constantly happening? You need to realise that’s not normal and you deserve better

Has he STOPPED emotionally abusing you? Usually, it'll take time. Resentment fades with time.

https://open.spotify.com/episode/1oSf68n0HrTe6mDtgUhk11?si=KYv_1WafQHyere4YMDNAhA&context=spotify%3Ashow%3A0HXMBQQ7989zkr2jCibGJF

https://open.spotify.com/episode/2MYTjQ542rEeAm0FWB3Hai?si=TehcVGoIQE-J_jefrGMXSA&context=spotify%3Ashow%3A0HXMBQQ7989zkr2jCibGJF

Both these links are to Dr.Chavonnes podcast. I think the biggest question to be asked is what the ladies above asked, are you still being abused. Dr.Chavonne is very clear that her advice is for people in healthy non-abusive relationships. Of course people are gonna disagree and get into ruts and what not but actual abuse is not okay. So I posted a link to her episode of, what is normal and if you are both working things out I think her episode of how to stop ruminating is a good episode as well. She saved my marriage with helping me communicate what I needed and my husband was very receptive to it.

I stopped resenting my emotionally abusive partner... AFTER I left and healed

Mine was situational so we talked about it and he stepped up. I would never stay in an abusive relationship especially without change. If he doesn't take responsibility for his words and actions then there is a good chance you are dealing with a narcissist and the only way to move forward is to leave. If he is able to be accountable for his words then that's a step forward. But he still needs to change in order for the relationship to work.

@Raqi im so close to leaving.

@Ashley yeah mine pretends to take accountability but he thinks of himself as almighty and I’m wrong. Ex : I offered to have a few drinks over The Weeknd we had 1 wine bottle and he started being an asshole to me emotionally abusing me. Then the next day he said it was my fault bc I offered him to drink . 😑

We got to the point where I had hired a divorce attorney and I was moving out. I HATED him, we could not have a conversation without fighting, we were miserable. We had been seeing a couples therapist but decided to try a new one for one last shot and for some reason she made something click for him and it's been a few months now and we actually like each other again. So yes, I got over it, but only because I saw a DRAMATIC change that seems to be sticking. If he shifts back though, I won't be waiting nearly as long to call my lawyer as I did the first time.

I divorced mine and I’ve never been happier. We have a great coparent relationship now and my child is thriving.

@Amber seems like the majority of voters said they couldn’t get over their resentment so it doesn’t make me very hopeful.

When the axe forgets, the tree remembers every cut it made. With my new partner, we are extremely cautious not to ever speak to one another or behave in a way that is openly disrespectful. My partner has only ever mentioned once that my tone was inappropriate, and I’ve only ever had to caution him on language once. We’re both divorced. We know what’s at stake. We love each other endlessly and we know how to preserve that now.

@Amber wow 👏 so true ! Knowing what’s at stake . I feel if I stay it’s a long journey to recovery