Others holding toddler
Show your support
@Kirsty thankyou for your comment. Yes I agree, children don't have to be cuddled by someone they just met and can show bonding and affection in other ways. She enjoys playing with others and can be smiling with them but the second they try to pick her up, she gets upset. I don't know why people keep persisting. She is the same even without me being present. My husband tries to hand her over to his friends when I'm not there abd he's commented before on how she won't go to them
I think in a situation like that although uncomfortable you had two choices either outright saying I don’t think she wants to come to you right now and plonking your daughter on your husband (because that would make a statement) or just taking her to the bathroom with you. Hindsight is 20/20 and I understand how frustrating that must have been. My take is we are our children’s advocates and don’t let anyone make you feel overprotective or rude if you’re advocating for your child no matter how trivial the situation may seem to them. She crossed a boundary and you tried to address it politely so after that anything goes imo just because children are cute it doesn’t make them fair game to anyone that wants affection/attention on any given occasion it’s so annoying!
I don’t tolerate it. After the first time of saying they don’t want to, I will just up and leave with my toddler
So important to teach your daughter boundaries and that respecting her personal space is important. Especially if she's already expressing she needs space and doesn't want to be touched by this person. To me there seems to be 2 issues, 1- this person isn't respecting her space, and 2- they're not respecting YOU when you tell them not to hold her. I think you should have a stern talk with both this friend and your husband, so he knows how important it is and can support you better
Definitly not, I think you need to sit down and have a chat with your husband. Explain this isn't about your anxiety but teaching your daughter that if she is uncomfortable with something happening to her that she is empowered to stop it. Children can be taught ways to show respect/affection without having to give in to the physical wants of others including adults, friends and close family. As a dad his support of her choices now translates to future situations when he isn't there and the other parties intentions could be less innocent. At the same time at 15 months old I'd be careful saying your daughter hates being held when she could be feeding off your feelings. Toddlers typically go through phases one week they are wary of new people and the next week they want to hug everyone. It's important in both situations that we safely empower their choices and teach them to do the same for others as well.