Narcissistic Mother
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I’ve had the same war with my own mother, I’m the eldest of 3 and my younger siblings still suffered with it but less so I think… After a massive row May of 2023, I went very low contact with my mother, only really speaking to update her on my son, then another big row at the start of summer this year and I’ve gone no contact… it’s so hard and I have daily guilt over it but I’ve found that overall my mental health has improved drastically even with the stresses of being a first time mum. It’s so hard to look at your own child and know 100% you’d never treat them the way you’ve been treated. Overtime though I’m finding that not being like my mother is healing my inner child. I hope you’re able to find some peace too! Your priority now is your children which means you also need to prioritise yourself so you can be the best mum you can be for them! X
I can empathize with you. My mother in law is a narcissist. I've seen the damage she has done on her kids and I've gone thru the same mistreatment too. They are nasty towards everyone. She has no one. We've gone low contact with her.
@Rosie It blows my mind because I could never do or say the things she does to my own daughter. My daughter is 2 and already refuses to give my mother hugs or do anything she asks. Not out of me teaching her but the fact that my daughter just doesn’t like her vibe. That’s also saddens me even more because she barely has any grandparents that are present besides my MIL who is an absolute gem. That’s another story is how my mother feels she’s in competition with my MIL when it comes to my daughter🤦🏼♀️
@Sarah That is exactly what my husband says to me, that she’s an adult and she’s doing this to herself by the way she treats people. But still it’s so hard to feel I’ve abandoned her because I know she won’t see why, she’s never at fault for anything and she never apologizes. She just plays the victim again and again.
I wouldn’t worry, my MIL is also the only one showing an interest which saddens me but I myself only had my nana (mothers side) involved in my life and she was and still is so amazing that it makes up for the others being absent x
I'm sorry you are going through all of this. Narcissist are the worst people to deal with... I also have one for a mother. I used to be right where you are feelings wise and cry for my Mom. Over time I have learned that she is an adult and her loss of people and relationships is do to her inability to respect boundaries. I have also learned to place boundaries with her and to not fall for her manipulation. When I became a parent is when I stopped allowing her to disrespect me and also when I was saddened by the fact that she is my Mom and our relationship will never be without very hard boundaries. Since I have put up boundaries and hardcore stuck to them my relationship with her has gotten better. It is very tiring to have a relationship like that with someone though...maybe evenore when it's supposed to be someone who loves and supports you unconditionally.