Social media, mum guilt

I have been bed sharing and breastsleeping for a little over two months and I absolutely love how I am able to sleep most nights and how easy it is to breastfeed. But occasionally I see the odd social media post, full of comments on how dangerous cosleeping is and then I can't help but feel guilt and anxiety... Anyone else feeling the same?

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If you love it you shouldn’t care what’s on social media. Remember, bedsharing is the norm around the world. We are biological designed to sleep with our babies

Yes! I have been co sleeping for nearly a year now and feel the same. Im soo anxious about something happening too.

I think everything motherhood is about making informed decisions. The information is out there because of accidents that have happened as a result of cosleeping, however, no one should feel ashamed or judged. Lead with YOUR motherly instincts.. unwanted opinions is just noise. I cosleep because it works for me and my baby and that’s that.. (I say works for me very loosely lol my daughter is the boss and has decided my bed is now hers 🫠) 🫶🏾

Please read the book safe infant sleep by james j mckenna! Breastsleeping is the safest way for your baby to sleep, as long as youre doing it safely, the book talks all about breastsleeping and all things considered sleeping its really incredible and research based

No. There will always be a “group” of people that are against something you’re doing and if you’re being safe and it’s working for you then I would just scroll past and do my thing. People are always going to have opinions, doesn’t make them right and you wrong!

The way I'm looking at it to cope with my anxiety is SIDS and suffocating can happen regardless of sleep surface be it crib or bedsharing. These little buggers are just so hellbent on trying all the unaliving possibilities sometimes 😅 So, there are risks with all of it, regardless of what you do, so keep on bedsharing, just make sure you're doing it as safely as possible and following the guidance/rules 💕

I wouldn’t worry about parenting advice circulating on social media. Regarding sleep or anything else. Do what’s right for you and your family. Make choices based on scientific information. The science proves that’s safe bedsharing (for example safe sleep 7) is very safe and beneficial for children. No evidence that it is detrimental in any way 😊

My SM is full of hair and nails and dance videos 😂 I don’t see that stuff. But if you follow the Safe 7 cosleeping methods to a T then your risk is dramatically lowered. If it works for you keep doing it and try to watch other stuff or follow pages specifically for your interests so you know their content, so random stuff like that don’t pop up. I also coslept and BF, he was 50/50 on bassinet and bed, and it worked for us. BF actually lowers the risk of SIDS, as is using a paci for those who don’t BF. The cosleep stories I’ve heard gone wrong are the ones drug/alcohol related, or the man refused to put baby back and slept on the couch w the baby. So yeah don’t sleep on the couch and you should be okay

They used to call it cot death for a reason. Here is a research paper which actually explored the reduction in SIDs with bed sharing and breast feeding. It put my mind at ease. For context, I work for the emergency services and have been to three incidents of SIDS, 2 were an over tired mum accidentally falling asleep sitting up and the baby has fallen down the side and the other in a cot. I was very anxious about cosleeping too, because the incidents live with me, but after falling asleep accidentally with baby on me I looked into it and so happy with my decision. Here is the research paper - https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC9792691/

Yes!! Not just bed sharing but everything else too. It's one of the reasons I'm trying to stay off of my phone. It increases my mom guilt and anxiety about everything I do 😔 It's hard being a mom.

We co slept for probably 10.5 months and he will still in bed if and when he needs. Everyone will have different opinions on everything you do with your baby/ies. I don't care what people say, as long as my baby is safe, happy and fed and it works for us then it works.

Our western society is as far from natural as one can get and if we look around we see all the effects of that. Leading with your instinct to sleep next to baby is one of the most revolutionary things you can do. The Mytg of Normal by Gabor Mate goes into details on this. The continuum concept by Jean Liedloff gives a perspective on how we are supposed to live and what we have lost through our western ways. It's through developing a truly holistic worldview about human nature that I'm now completely immune to the anti-life sentiments of modern society.

Thank you so much for all your comments and reassurance. I know it is ultimately the best thing for the both of us. We went from sleeping 45min/1h in a row to sleeping up to 4h in a row and having full nights. The whole discourse in the UK around bed sharing is so full of shame and guilt, we aren't even explained how to do it safely, we have to do our own research. As a researcher myself, seeing data and scientific evidence really helps. Thank you so much, I am going to order the book as well. Thank you ladies I really needed this reassurance ❤️

It's not dangerous hun. I did it too and most people around the world do as well. Research shows Japan has the highest rate of co sleeping and the lowest rate of SIDS