Postpartum coming back??

I'm pregnant with my second my first is a toddler. My first I suffered really badly with postpartum depression and psychosis. As I'm closer to my due date it feels as if myt firstborn is unbearable again and I feel the mindset I was in before coming back. The birth of my firstborn was very traumatic and I'm terrified ill die again and won't come back this time (me and baby were both declared dead briefly). I don't know what to do. I'm overwhelmed
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Have you made contact with the perinatal mental health team, your GP or the mental health midwifery team? Or even consultant if you have one so you can discuss your first birth experience and what you want this one to be like? I hope you can get some help x

@Cheryl I did have an initial assessment at 12 weeks which they said I seemed okay at the time, i have put myself back in contact with the mental health midwifery team but it's just waiting for the specialists to have me back

Ah I see, yes can take a while can't it. I ended up under parents in mind, health in mind, then the mental health midwives got in touch! So now have them all.

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