Drowning

Hey guys, I’m not sure what I’m looking for by posting this but I just need to be able to talk about it freely. I’ve been slowly losing my mind. I’m a first time mom and only 23 years old. When I got pregnant I was just signing up for school and me and the child’s father had went through something very traumatic (he had fought me-literally). I didn’t want to keep it but he had convinced me not to “let our issues ruin something special” and that he’s “always wanted to be a dad”. Ikik silly of me to let him convince me. Fast forward the cheating my entire pregnancy and just over all narcissistic behaviour. He was trying to fight me literally 2 days before my birthday and when I called the police he had ME arrested! That’s just some character backstory! He has now abandoned my daughter. I’m 100000% okay not being with him. But he will tell me he’s coming and then when she’s all ready to go he will stop responding altogether. It’s hurting me because I was the kid waiting on the porch for their dad who never came , and now my daughter is the same. And I guess im just kinda drowning in my emotions. I’m overwhelmed and anxious alllll the timeeee! I don’t have a community at all, trying to get a job is so hard because how ? What do I do with my daughter ? And daycare offers subsidy but only if I’m working or going to school. How can I do that with my daughter here 24/7 365. I’m spiralling and trying my hardest not to give up but idk if I can do this anymore.

Show your support

hey babes. so best thing to do is not let her know if he’s planning on coming. he’s already shown you and her that he’s unreliable and not a good father. no need to get her hopes up anymore. if he says he’s going to pick her up say cool and leave it at that if he shows, then great but if he doesn’t at least your daughter won’t be disappointed. As far as work/school it can definitely be hard without help. But maybe being able to do something outside of being “mom” would be good for you. Maybe look at part time jobs and see if there are any reliable sitters in your area

i know that a lot of college students specializing in early childhood education babysit at a discounted rate to gain experience (i was one of said students and we’d post in local mom facebook groups/nextdoor app)

@sarah 💗💗💗💗💗

if you need anyone to talk to my DMs are always open. I’m 23 too and about to have 2 under 1 so i feel you. The exhaustion is real. Mentally and Physically

@sarah maybe I will soon. I’m just kinda embarrassed by my overall situation

there’s no need to be embarrassed! it’s a completely normal feeling

I was there. Walking in those shoes, except I was 18 & fresh out of high school. It’s hard. Especially when you don’t have a “village”. Parenting alone is the hardest thing there is to do. Im here if you need to talk.

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