Guilt

I think you’ve answered your own question in a way. As you clearly feel guilty by what you have mentioned maybe mention to him about going to the gym once or twice a week or weekend to start off with let him dedicate some time to it which will hopefully start lifting his mood. It’s also good for his mental and physical health! But having said that make sure you dedicate some time for yourself and do something you enjoy twice a week then it’s fair. Raising a baby is hard but you still need to do personal things for yourself otherwise you can’t be the best version to your babies. Also, I understand you can’t just find a new job quickly so with that one I’m not sure what to suggest but maybe him going to gym might lift his moods which in turn makes him more tolerant to his new job x

You yourself probably aren’t the cause for his sadness however the change in life. My partner was always in the gym before we met, eating well and out a lottt, working as a coach. I then got pregnant in March & he had to change his job as he wasn’t earning enough, i’m out of work at the moment due to seizures so he will be the main provider for the baby, it’s definitely changed him a little but but he does still take time to go to the gym just nowhere near as often as before because he wants to look after me. He’s quite different to when i first met him but change does that to people, that doesn’t mean that you are making him sad, life being busy is probably the cause. Let him know you can handle things for some extra time while he goes to the gym if you can just so he’s got something he used to love back etc, work on it together as a team and you will both feel better for it x

@Katie yea I just worry because we had discussed how he wasn’t ready for kids yet and then found out I was pregnant a few days later and I feel like he was pushed into a lifestyle he had no intention of being in and he doesn’t complain or anything but I know it’s hard on him and I don’t want it to lead to resentment. I tell him he can take time for himself but he just says no and looks upset and I’m super worried about his mental health

I completely understand, my partner wasn’t ready for kids yet, him and his family wanted me to terminate but i absolutely refused and then i was terrified he would resent me as well, he’s been very involved in my pregnancy always feeling baby moving etc and he does adore her already. It’s gotta be difficult if he won’t take time for himself though, that’s one thing me and my partner have made sure of is that he takes some time for himself. I would definitely try to keep pushing for it and just telling him you really don’t want him to lose himself etc, he might just be trying to look after you first