Not married moms

Ugh I hate those kind of people. It's really none of their business at all. My "husband" and I are not legally married but we wear rings and tell everyone we are husband and wife, because we don't need a government document to make us married. That's how I avoid those people lol

I would just reply "it's none of your business" with a big smile. I got a lot of the same questions early on with my partner when we were expecting out first and that was always my reply. They stopped asking really quick lol. We've been together now over 12 years, we finally got engaged December 2023 and are now expecting our 3rd child. We wear rings like we're married even though we aren't and people have just stopped asking about a wedding.

There's so tough. My husband and I were living common law in Canada for 7yrs. We legally had to get married when he had to move to Colorado for work simply so I could get a visa. A single document shouldn't justify whether or not someone is married. No matter what people will ask, ultimately it's none of their business. I always told people there's other things we want to do before putting money in a wedding.

@Leslie I wish I could & although I totally agree with you I need to come up with a professional way to say mind your business because I work with clients in a professional setting🥲

When someone says that to me I say “idk why don’t you ask him?” Because I’m not the one proposing (just not how our relationship is he will be the one to propose) we have been together 6yrs this October so I get it a lot 🤦‍♀️

You could always make what I said into a joking manner like “oh if only I knew, you should ask him” and laugh a little at the end…it keeps it professional but also gets the point across of “idk idc so stop asking”

@Amanda i understand that but at the end of the day, they're clients, they're not really your friends so you don't owe them any answers or explanations. I think setting that boundary, even though they may be loyal clients is important.

I hate it! And all the moms say “ my husband” and I just feel so left out and it’s so hard to make mom friends

@Mommy this! It’s crazy how other moms judge you because you’re not married and then don’t really want to be friends because they see you as “single”

My ex and I were together for 5+ years and I would get that question a lot. I would honestly say “when the time is right plus Im not the one proposing so ask him” and then I’d laugh at the end cause they’ll be like true and then the subject changes

@Leslie I understand what you’re saying, but saying mind your business is not inappropriate way to speak to clients it would need to be worded and a professional manner, is what I am saying. Do you have any recommendations on how to professionally word that? As I’m a licensed professional I can’t just talk to people with an attitude. Lol

@Amanda "while I understand your curiosity, I don't feel that question is appropriate for us to discuss here. Let's talk about something else" I also feel like tone and delivery is a big part of it. You can say outright that it's just not something you care to discuss with them and they need to be understanding and respectful of that. I think in this day and age people view a lot of things as "disrespectful" when in reality, it isn't or they get caught in their feelings about stuff. I've always been a blunt and straightforward person because I don't like things being awkward or misunderstood. I also don't like people assuming we have a certain type of relationship when in fact we don't lol. Like we're not friends. You're here for a service and I'm here to do a job. I'm also a lot better at delivering messages to kids since I worked with NYC DOE for almost 14 years so when it came to telling parents things I'd literally be like "ha ha were not friends, I just work with your child" and they'd back off 😅

"That's not usually something I discuss with clients. Let's talk about something else" I've also asked my friends, who are way more eloquent than me (lol) how to nicely say mind your business so I'm waiting on some responses

"we aren't (even if you plan to), I don't believe in marriage." Say no and it's cause YOU don't want to. Otherwise, it's woe is you for getting "knocked up". 😒😮‍💨

Been with mine 7 years, lived together for 5, have a 2.5yo, and one due in the spring. We keep planning it but stuff gets in the way 😂 And we don’t wanna quicky court marriage (nothing wrong with one I just had to listen to my mom complain all my life that she was married twice and had court weddings each time so idk she turned me off from them). We are happy and that’s what really matters.