Younger child won't let me near older child
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Getting real possessive over me. It was kinda random bc she’s normally really good and caring but I think it was her being overwhelmed with them coming over everyday and spending the night. But I gave them all equal love and told her you see how you need a hug they need a hug too and then we do a group hug. So hope that helps
You will need to give time and attention to your older child whether the you get one cries or not. You’ve shown the younger child that you would literally do anything for her if she cries and throws a fit and now your older child thinks that because the younger one is here and what they want is more important than what your older child wants. You will need to teach your younger child that your older child’s feelings are valid as well
You're doing the opposite of what you need to be doing in these situations. Unless the younger child is hurt or has another immediate need like a diaper change, it's okay to tell them that their *older* sibling needs you right now, and you'll cuddle baby in a little bit. Older sibling asked for your attention first and the younger has learned that she doesn't have to share you as long as she throws a big enough fit, while the elder has learned that not only does she HAVE to share you, little sisters desires come first.
They are both still small. 3 and a half year olds need their mommy as much as a one year old. I think attention needs to be shared between the two or the older one will begin to resent the 1 year old.
To be honest you have trained/enabled her now to think that’s acceptable. You have also shown to your oldest she doesn’t matter as much as your youngest. You need to say no , I’m her mommy too and give your oldest bonding time in front of your youngest. She will eventually get over it. But yea if you’re dismissing your daughter like that all or majority of the time… yes going to feel that way. I would personally plan a day soon with just the oldest and let know she matters just as much. And from that point forward if she wants a cuddles or time with you to give it and if the youngest has an issue tell her the oldest is mommy‘s babies too and/or that she has to share and/or she needs love too just like you. And then even add the little one AFTER the oldest get her own time.. for a group hug or cuddles. I don’t have two kids but I have a god daughter and son that I watch almost everyday and have to deal with my daughter feeling that way. But i nipped that in the butt once she started