Potty training
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Signs of readiness: 1. Age: 18-30 months old; note, it's very, VERY rare I've seen a child truly ready before 24 months. 27 months tends to be a "golden" age. Boys are typically ready later than girls. I do not recommend waiting longer than 30 months unless a child is truly not ready, because for neurotypical children past that point it becomes more of a choice than a lack of ability. 2. Are they interested in the potty? Do they like to watch you go, or mimic you? 3. Can they pull their own pants up and down and perform small dressing tasks, like putting easy shoes and pants on themselves? 4. Are their diapers dry for longer periods of time at least 2 hours? 5. Can they identify when they have peed or pooped? Do they hide to poop? 6. Can they follow 2 step directions?
The Method 1. Pick a week where you are not busy, preferably no major holidays or trips coming up. This is why I'm waiting until after Christmas minimum. The excitement and being off their schedule can make training very difficult. 2. Once you commit, you commit. Starting and then stopping makes it way harder the next time you start. 3. No pull ups. They are a crutch and I do not like them as a potty training aid. They feel like diapers and don't allow children to feel the consequence of soiling themselves. I feel the same way about the thick training undies, although with less vehemence. Once they've switched they are in UNDIES (with one exception which I will cover) 4. Go pants free for a few days. I prefer to have them in undies so they can get used to pulling them up and down, some have them in nothing. Once they get used to actually using the potty, you can add pants.
5. When they have an accident, no shaming. Point out that it feels yucky (ew, that poop feels squishy and gross doesn't it?), remind them that pee and poop like to be in the potty and that next time when they have that feeling, to hurry to the potty, and have them help you clean it up. 6. Praise them for listening to their bodies when they go potty, but I do not recommend potty treats. We want them to be internally motivated, not motivated by receiving treats. Poop often takes longer to get the hang of than pee, do not get discouraged, and do not force them to sit on the potty.
That's really it. If you wait until they're ready it only takes about a week. The one exception for pull ups is during sleep times. It often takes much longer for them to get the hang of being potty trained overnight as it is entirely an unconscious biological process, you are not doing anything wrong if they still need a pull up overnight by 3 or even 4. For materials, just find a potty chair that suits your needs, or one of the ones that goes on your current toilet, and a stool to allow them access to wash their hands if you don't already have one. Make sure you have plenty of undies and clothes, and shoes that are easy to wash. Involve them in the undies choosing process to make it exciting. You'll need to help them wipe for a while, but once they start doing it themselves they WILL have poop streaks in their undies, it's gross, but they'll learn. Keep a basket with books or special easy to clean and sanitize potty toys that are for the potty only. It makes it more enticing.
What you can be doing now: encourage independent self care skills, like pulling up pants and cleaning up messes. It builds confidence, and confidence is essential to potty training. Read books about going potty, like Diapers Are Not Forever and Everybody Poops. Talk about going potty, let them observe you in the potty and narrate what you're doing. "Do you hear that splash? That's my pee, I peed on the potty. Now I'm flushing. Now I have to wash my hands, going potty gets germs on our hands!" Encourage them to identify pee and poop; "did you pee or poop? Oh look, it's poop! *Show diaper* Eww poop. Poop goes in the potty" and I know this sounds gross but let them see yours too if you've got a bathroom stalker. Talk about it all. The. Time. "I'm picking out undies. One day you'll wear undies! You pooped in your diaper. When you're bigger you'll poop in the potty like Daddy."
Stop dipping your toe in the water. Either you're all in or you're not, it's confusing that you've "tried a few different times" because now she knows it's not for real. Once you start there's no going back. Personally, having potty trained a dozen kids as a toddler teacher, I plan to wait until 24-27 months minimum. From what I'm seeing here I'd say she's not ready. Wait until she's 2 and reevaluate.