How to convince my husband to have our second child now?

When is the right time?! There is never ever a right time

@Lisa he's says it's not the right time and we'd be irresponsible to have another one right now. He also references his aunt who had a child at 45 saying we have a lot of time.

Over 35 doesn't mean as much as you think. We started TTC when we were 36.5... got pregnant a few weeks after I ( and a few days after hubby) turned 37.... Had my son at 37 weeks and 3 days pregnant 😳 .... He just turned one on 06 21 24 🥰 Delivery was fairly uncomplicated aside from the end. Labor was good overall. No pregnancy complications

We kept waiting for the right time to even have a first kid and said ... If we keep waiting for the right time we'll never have kids at all

Is he saying it's a bad time financially because of costs of prenatal care and of the hospital stay?

Yeah some women over 35 might be fine but you might also not be fine and ivf is not cheap! or easy especially if you have the choice to do it like heterosexuals do I would get on it

I’m 35 now with an 8 month baby. I desperately want another but personally I know I couldn’t cope with 2 under two and a man child. Financially also need to return to work before we even go for baby number 2. Have you talked out reasons together and does he understand how your feeling? Just because his aunt was 45 doesn’t men that is going to be relevant to you xx

My husband says the same thing!

You might be fine, you might not be fine. If your little one is nearly two and you start trying now.... Even if it takes two to three months... You've had at least the minimum spacing between pregnancies ... 18 months suggested by acog...

@Lisa he says I'm being too emotional. Combined including our cars we have about $20000 of debt that he wants to get rid of before thinking about a second child. His new position that he is getting comes with a $20000 bonus so to me that argument isn't valid. We had already talked about putting it in an investment for a year and then use it to pay off everything.

@Elizabeth not relevant to my question (last part) Also free health care so no hospital bills. Except maybe $200 for a private room.

Why does he think it's not the right time? If it's the debt that is the issue, maybe a solid plan would help get you both aligned for next steps. If you want 3, it sounds like you really need a timeline of both of your expectations. Maybe meeting with a financial advisor would help him see the numbers and work out how to make everything work. I get his worries, though, especially with the cost of living so high, but there's no guarantee it will come down soon so putting things off may not help as much as he thinks.

Kids are not accessories. Children cost money time and effort. Maybe listen to him and see what his reasoning is