Shall I go another round of IVF?

I am struggling to take a decision :-( I am 42 and I have managed to have a baby 2 years ago, but recently my last embryo transfer failed and I am devastated. So was thinking to go for another round of IVF, but my chances are very slim due to my age, the stress and the IVF process as you know is very very difficult and I am not sure how I will cope with an another failure; my toddler may be in the spectrum of autism which implies that if successful my second will also have autism, it is quite a lot of money, if successful we will have to change home at some point as we leave in a 2 bed flat (but cannot really afford buy a house any time soon); hubby doesn’t really mind if we stay only with the one child, even though he would like a sibling. On the other hand I am sure I will regret not trying to have another child! So not sure what to do? My mind says to not further pursue it but my heart says to go for it…

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You don’t want to have any regrets. Why do you say your second will have autism too?

It is genetics, so if the one exhibits the next do as well :-( my toddler is functional and apart from a couple weird movements- stimming- there is not any other issue ( and I hope to stay like this), but not sure if it will be worse in another baby. Also not sure what other issues the baby can have because of my age :-(

Gosh this is a tricky one. What do you think you’d regret more, not trying? Or trying and not succeeding? If you were successful, you’d make the life changes work. But you need to be confident if you’re one and done. Would you consider adoption? X

Funnily enough my husband and I were having this discussion earlier. We have our one year old and one embryo left that we plan on trying next year, if it doesn’t work we said we wouldn’t do another round due to the emotional turmoil, and finances, but it is such a hard decision, will I wake up in 10 years and wish we had? Who knows.

@Soph this is exactly what we have discussed a couple of years ago 😹

You can also always adopt or do surrogacy with a donor egg if you’re okay with it. I know ppl in their 30s that went the donor egg route already bc of diminished reserves. It’s totally up to you but you’ve got one pumpkin already which is magic !

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