Adoption?

Have you two talked about marriage? Do you know how he feels about marriage. If that’s something you want and will feel more comfortable making him your son’s official dad if you two are married, I would definitely have clear communication about that. Don’t worry, it won’t spoil the moment of you getting the ring. Clarity and clear communication makes relationships even better

@Botanica he's raised him since he was 2 weeks old and our newborn will have his or her dad's last name as that's what my son has, I believe he's alright with marriage as my father has told us after an argument we either split or get married, I'd rather he did become my sons dad cause at the end of the day my sons not gotten to know his real dad cause his real dad doesn't care x

Gotcha

@Botanica he's helped me through my seizures, and lives with me and cares for me daily and helps me raise my son, he has not once wanted to take the sperm doners place but that man refused to even acknowledge my son not even money a month in support of raising him nor even a gift or card for his birthday or Christmases he's had 3 Christmases and birthdays without his biological father or any of that family around they didn't want him xx

Where i live the bio dad would have to sign his rights away regardless of not being around.. one of my old friends had that issue when she was looking to have her one son adopted and couldn't because he still had parental rights regardless of not being around for 5 years.still isn't and still can't do it for either of her boys

Talk to a lawyer. May be easier to do if y’all go get married. I was adopted by my sisters father when I was 4. I remember in discussing it later that at the time they just had to put an announcement in the paper or something because they had no way to reach my bio dad.

Some places you have to be married to adopt him

@Kalene I'm the UK 🤷x

@Alice yeah my sons bio dad chose his girlfriend and family over the child he created and basically told me get an abortion if you want then after 4 months blamed it all on me and went no contact 🤷

@Sami I'm Scotland 🤷 dunno what the rules are here

when my dad adopted me since my bio dad was on the birth certificate he had to give the okay for him to adopt me. I see your in the uk so potentially it does work different there. I’m not really sure he would be able to adopt if you guys aren’t married so I’m assuming he’s thinking of a ring too👀

@Tayva hopefully 🥺🤞, been together 4 years next year and my parents love him x

That’s amazing! And also it’s so beautiful he wants to adopt your child. I remember the joy I felt the day I was adopted to finally have a dad🥹 your son will forever be grateful 🫶🏾

@Tayva but he has messaged his ex behind my back before flirting with her during a small fall out we had, but reassures me it's nothing, he's 30,im 24... In Oct.. Currently as stated prior, 13 going on 14 weeks pregnant with his child

Maybe just keep your eye out but adoption is a big thing that involves a lot. I feel if he was hiding things he wouldn’t even be thinking about that kind of stuff unless your thinking it’s just a butter you up Situation but by how well you describe him I think he seems serious!

@Tayva am just kinda nervous as my sons bio dad walked out when he was 4month old after playing the whole happy card and wanting a family etc, I'm scared of getting left again xx

That’s super valid. Maybe you could bring up a marriage convo? He does seem more reliable cause your son is 3 and you stated you have been with him for 3 years so it seems he has been in his life basically the whole time haha. I guess I’m not sure where you live but in the USA it does cost for a step parent to adopt so I would hope he wouldn’t wanna loose money just to walk out😅 I think I would bring up marriage tho before talking adoption cause that more than likely has to happen first!